i can NEVER ask for more

2012-01-26T02:01:00.004+08:00

Hello!
Im back again and again.
Just feel like updating today.

Its been such a great long weekends.
Spent most of my time at home with family.
Its been such a long time.
It feels so good to be home!

16 days to solemnization day!

Ready for this?

Im getting so so excited!
Getting so impatient.
But at the same time, i always imaginee..
Hows life gonna be after becoming someone's wife.

Never once i stop praying to Him to guide
us the right way and give us His guidance.
May God Willing.

Sending out invitation to friends make me realise
that ive left primary, secondary and ite days so many yrs ago.
But im glad there's Facebook that connects friends together.

Without realising, these are my friends who i used to be close with.
Be it from primary to secondary school days.
Im glad they are excited for my upcoming big day.
And with this invitation, im sure there will be reunions.
Im the very first to get married.
How can they not be excited? Hehe.

Not only my dear friends, my family too!
I feel as if its Wedding of the Year. Hahaha.
And my paternal side make me realise hw much they love me
especially my wawa (grandma) and ibu (aunt).
Ibu never fail to call me up to check on preparations.
Wawa is so busy with invitations.
How can they not be busy?
They have been the ones who took care of me
since i was few months old cos mama has to go out to work.
And i am the very first grandaughter to get married!

Not to mention, my dearest family.
They have been the most busy man and women!
I swear i love you people!

2 more days to my fitting day.
And then 2 more weeks to go.
Ohh myyy!

Will update abt my fitting real soon!

Goodnight lovelies.
XOXO.

2012-01-14T03:02:00.002+08:00

I cant deny this.
My bestest best friend is my very own fiancé.
He is the ONLY one who knows me inside out.
He is the ONLY one who understands me.
He is the ONLY one who never fail to give me support.
He is the ONLY one who will be by my side both
good and bad times.
And definitely...
He is the ONLY one who i wanna spend the
rest of my life with.

I thank God for the gift that He has given me.
Nothing much i could ever ask for.
May this love bring us together in Jannah..
Insyallah, aminn.

<3 <3 <3

2012-01-12T01:54:00.003+08:00

Hello 2012.
(i know im late)
Ok, im finally back here after months.
The last time i blogged got saved in drafts
and somehow i don't feel like posting it.

So here i am, back again blogging and updating.

Nothing much to talk about 2011.
It was just another year full of
sweet and bitter memories.
I learnt alot of things.
That makes me stronger today.

So, finally 2012 is here.
It seems like time is chasing after us now.
There is no way for you to turn it all back.
Appreciate every second and live life to the fullest.

Today, exactly a month to go will be my big day.
29 days to my solemnization.
Preparation was definitely crazy but thank God
we worked things out together.
And thank God, 90% are done for now.

Didn't expect wedding to be expensive.
But im sure it's worth a lifetime.
May God willing, till death do us apart.

I swear im the happiest girl.
I found the right man in life.
The qualities in him definitely makes a perfect husband.
He will be the man who will guide me in life.
Not just me, but our kids too.

It's hard to explain this feelings.
But i know, i cant live without him.
And im crazy in love till today.

Never once i ever thought that i will be
really getting married at this age.
Too young? Nahh, but if you are stable enough,
it's time to get hitched! But be sure to know he/she
is the right one!

Thinking back, ive done so much mistakes in life.
And karma has already taught me lessons.
So here i am, a changed girl, leading a simple life.

Deepest apologies to all those that ive hurt before.
Especially to the guys that ive cheated on.
I know im such a bad girl but we were too young.
I know afew school friends who gonna bitch about me
getting married first.
But believe it or not, im matured now.
Unlike those who loves bitching and
being such attention seekers.

My dearest family has been very supporting.
And getting busy with all such of preparations.
Siblings busy with their countdowns.
Parents busy searching for stuffs.
But i know, it will never be easy
for them to let me go.
Especially when siblings cant stop asking me
where i will be staying after getting married,
when mama keeps asking me to just live with her.
Papa might not say a thing, but i know he wants the best.
Its time for them to let this man take care of me. ;)

As the day is getting nearer, wedding jitters are all over.
Pre-marrital blues? Perhaps.

But i always pray that things will go smoothly.
May God willing.

For now, lets have a rest!
Another long day ahead later.

I promise i will update again when
The Day is getting nearer.
Please pray the best for me!

Goodnight lovelies!
Xoxo.

2011-10-07T05:11:00.002+08:00

Hello October!
Time is passing by too fast.
It's October already.
Two more months to 2012.
And four more months to the big day.

How i wish at times we could turn back time.
But at times, i dont wish to.
Nevertheless, the past makes us stronger today.
We learned through mistakes.

I am a happier and stronger WOMAN now.
Woman sounds old.
But it makes me feel matured.

Preparation has been tough.
But quite smooth.
Deco for our big day has been selected.
It shall be a secret for now.
I believe the colors would be grand enough. ;)
So right now, im left with pre-marriage course,
door gifts selection, booking of venue, invitation
cards and lastly, fitting.
Afterwhich is to wait patiently.

And right now, crucial time to get myself slim down!
Please tell me the fastest and cheapest way
besides running. Any recommendation for pills?
Im desperate. Really.
But beloved mama and sister disapproved of that.
Let's just drop the idea of taking pills and
continue running.

Who wouldn't wanna look great in their wedding dress?

One more thing that i need to prepare myself for.
Emotions.
Everyone knows how emotional i can get everytime.
I can cry even when watching sad dramas on TV.
I can have teary eyes attending to people's weddings.
I get emotional easily.
I need to really control these emotions.
Im just afraid that i cant stop
shedding tears on my big day
and spoil my make up.
My bridesmaids and make up artist
better standby boxes of tissue!
For the mean time, il try look up in the net
on how to control one's emotions on big day.

Ok its already going 5.30am now.
Let's just force myself to sleep.
Have to wake up for work later.
Endless paperwork!!
Whatever it is,
TGIF!!

I'll come back for more entries! ;)

2011-08-08T14:56:00.002+08:00

Tadahhh.
Ramadhan is here again. Today is already the 8th.
How fast time flies.
May Ramadhan this year be more meaningful for all of us.
It's time to cleanse and purify oneself and do good deeds.
Time to get closer to God above.

Semoga setiap amalan diterima olehNya. Amin.

Last updated was early July.
Im back here again to update on fantastic July!

First, it was Mr Fiancé's successful birthday celebration.
Had a hard time planning for it all.
It's never easy to plan for a surprise.
And all along, I've never succeed in suprising him.
Its been years already.
And this year, I told him we both shall plan for something
which is memorable for the both of us.

I thought of planning something simple for him.
Futhermore, it's our last celebration before we are tied down
with married life.
So i started ordering stuffs online for him.
And without me realising, items will not be delivered before his birthday.

So as normal, i started panicking.
And after some help, ive got it.

Last minute chalet at Goldkist Chalet at East Coast.

With much help for others, i managed to buy those last minute
stuffs from Mustafa Center the night before.
Went rushing here and there for presents and stuffs.
And Thank God, ive got a few to help me out with
transporting and preparing it all.

Mr Fiancé was working morning shift on that day.
Fake plan was to go and have a mini celebration for the two
of us at East Coast Lagoon.
So many heads were working on how to surprise him.
Its hard, i can say.
Cos he's an alert man. He is so alert that the plan can just go wrong.

Still, with much help, i brought him to the carpark chalet.
And thats where, he got sabotaged with eggs and flour.
Wuhooo! Finally, i made it.

A last minute simple chalet.
But most surprising for him is the presents.
Cos all his presents are yellow.
His favourite color.
His Swensens ice cream cake is yellow too!

So there goes his last singlehood birthday celebration.

Next, my 22nd birthday celebration!
Now this is the exciting part that i wanna share.

Days before my birthday, i so called got to know the gift.
Gucci tote bag.
And he made me believe that there's no surprise this year
and the gift is that Gucci tote.
He played me out all along.
Which i didnt even notice.

All these years, his surprise always work.
So i tell myself, this year no surprise cos ive spoilt it all.
Ok, so be it.
Just another year older.

So he made plans to go Carousel the day before my birthday.

I dressed up soo lady-like, with my long dress.
And packed my things ready for the day.
He came to my place with his car.

Just as i wanna open the car door, i tried to roll my eyes at the
back seat. Who knows I can find my Gucci tote. But its not there.
Next, i found a bouquet of red roses on my chair just as i open the door.
22 stalks of red roses to be exact.
How romantic can he be?

Wahhh! You make me blush baby.
Its been soo long since i received flowers.
Last was just a stalk of red rose on Valentine's day years ago.

Next to Carousel to have our high tea buffet.
Nothing much there but overall was great.
Food was good.

Afterwhich we head down to Far East, since its just opposite.
Window-shopping every level.
Fickle minded stop me from spending money.
The motive of going there was to kill time.

So when time is up, he asked me if im ready for the next surprise.

Ok, so i thought since i know the present earlier,
it must be some other surprise that he has planned.

Looking forward to have that Gucci tote.

So next, he drove to Paya Lebar pump station.
And he took out this cute pink blindfold which he asked me to wear la.
So, trying to be sporting, i do what he says.
Though many times, i laughed and keep asking where.
Eyes got blindfolded, ears got blast with loud music.
Trying to figure out where he is heading to, i lost my way
and so i couldnt even guess where am i.

Upon reaching this unknown place, he guided me the way.
He asked me to hold the bouquet of roses and just follow the instruction.
I did.

Came to a point, where i could feel the strong aircon and strong nice smell.
Tried to figure it out, but still, its unknown to me.
And when my iphone stops its song before playing another,
i heard, "Welcome to Singapore Zoo."

What?! Zoo?
I dont think so.
With his hand holding mine and making me turned here and there,
finally he asked me to sit.
Heart was pumping real fast.
Im still clueless where am i.

Next moment, he switch off the music and asked me to take out the blindfold.

And tadahhhhh!

SURPRISEE.

"Happy 22nd Birthday Susila"

Thats the first thing i saw over the city view when i open my eyes
and next the reflection of my dear friends behind me.

As normal, being an emotional girl, i shed tears.
Tears of joy.

Celebration at Marina Bay Sands.
Awesome!

Presents and games and speech.
Petals of roses everywhere.
Endless wishes.
All make me wanna cry so bad.
I just cant stop smiling.

But wait, its not over.

Every single one seems to be rushing home.
Nobody seems wanna stay over.
Its kinda weird.

After everyone went home, Mr Fiancé got everything prepared.
He placed soft drinks on the small table infront of the
bathtub filled with bubble foams. So we had our own time, chit-chatting and
laughing away. Little did i know, the surprise doesnt end there.

After shower and as i was preparing myself for a goodnight sleep,
i saw another wrapped gift on the bed.
Wahh! I love surprise.
I unwrapped and tore it all, but only to see a fake longchamp.
So being the normal me, i asked, "Isnt this fake?"
So he asked me back, "You want an orginal one instead?"
The moment he popped that Q, he showed me Longchamp original paperbag.
Next, he took out another original giftbox from the pillow where he hid it
and passed to me.
Unwrapped it, and tadahhh! Longchamp tote which ive been eye-ing!
Of course i cant stop smiling.
He knows it well that i love surprises.
Every single thing was just awesome!

So all along, he made me believe that there was Gucci.
When there isnt any in the first place.
I thought he didnt make it this time to make a good surprise.
But in fact, he made the best surprise ever!

Indeed, its a memorable one.
The last singlehood birthday.
I love it!

<3<3<3

2011-07-05T06:20:00.005+08:00

It's been soo long. I know it has been such a long time.
I just feel like Blogging today, after almost 8months.

Too many things happened.
Whatever it is, 2010 has been a good year.

2011 started off well enough.
But months and months that have passed,
its been quite a challenging one.
I believe there's more to come.
May I've got all the strength to go through it all,

Ups and downs are normal in life.
I dont deny it all.

Early of the year, travelled up to Hatyai with
Mr Fiancé and his Hayabusa.
Thank God, it was a safe and smooth journey for us.
Experienced all those hectic and lethargic hours
on the road for almost 12hrs.
Above all that, we managed and succeed! ;)

Savings have been prompt each month.
Strict savings, I must say.
It's for our upcoming big day next year.
May God Willing.
It's less than a year away. I'm excited and impatient but
at the same time, I'm nervous and terrified.
Let's just pray that it will be a smooth and successful event.

After quite a number of BTO applications, we finally secured
a place in Punggol. It will only be ready in about 3 years time.
By then, hopefully we will be able to settle down in our own place
we shall call HOME.

April 16, Mr Fiancé got into a serious bike accident with his
Hayabusa and suffered serious injuries incl his broken right kneecap.
Things weren't easy for us but Alhamdulilahh he's recovering well and fast.
Knowing that he got the strong will, I'm sure he will be recovering fully soon.

Relationship has been good so far.
Arguments occur here and there but I hope it makes
us stronger and not fall into something else.
May He gives us all the strength and patiece to go thru it all.

Less than a month, it will be Ramadhan.
How time flies.
But I hope it will be a more meaningful one for us cos
this is my last year being single before getting hitched.
Last single birthday, last single countdown and last single Raya of course.

I dont expext celebrations for it all.
I just wanna make it a memorable and meaningful one
before I've got tied down. ;)

I've got few months left to go for marriage preparation course,
to decide on my wedding theme and venue
but roughly I've got an idea.
I've yet to search for unique wedding door gifts.
Bridal make up artist and costumes
and catering are all set way earlier.

Insyaallah, I've got that ample time to sort it all out.

Ok, its nearly 7am and all i need to do now is to force myself to bed.
Working at 9am!

Till we meet again.

Easier said, life is not easy.

With much love,
Susila.

2010-11-22T18:55:00.001+08:00

I'm finally back here.
After months. (:

My 21st is a special day that i will always remember.
Not those bombastic celebration that ive got.
But its baby's grandpa's death anniversary.
My birthdate is grandpa's death date.
The day that i will always remember, the day that im reminded not
to be too happy about being a year older.

Atok, you will always be in my prayers.
The day when i visited you, i whispered to you.
"If only you are here, i would have talked to you in person.
I've never got the chance to. And here i am, whispering prayers to
you on your graveyard.
Insyaallah ditempatkan di dalam golongan orang2 yang beriman. Al-fatehah."

Ive changed bikes twice within 3 months.
After i got my 2A license, i rode baby's superb bike, Super 4 Spec III.
It was indeed a great ride, a ride that i have always love.
But ive changed to Suzuki Drz after 2months.
But ended up not satisfied with it. Ive no choice but continue riding.
It wasnt that bad after all, only speed that concerns me. (:
No worries, once i doll you up nicely, eyes will be on you Baby Zee.

I've started cooking! Well, still learning. And soon, i will be ready to cook for everyone.
Especially for husband-to-be. Eeeeyeeeww. Haha.

Ok, saving for marriage isnt as easy as it seems.
You get so stress up everytime when you need to put aside that big amount monthly.
I wonder how people get married without forking out those big amount.
Put aside, those who are forced to get married.
How i wish ive got the money!
We have yet to come out with the wedding theme.
I would love to have a white wedding, but i would also love to have a shocking pink and black.
Wait till ive decided on this.
For now, lets just focus on the saving.
And yes! We have applied a BTO scheme.
Results not out yet. Hopefully we are one of those who got successful application.
I dont mind staying with his parents for the time being. But i would love to have my own place
that i will call home.

Things have been doin great soo far.
Work has been alot busier this month till year end.
May bonus this year be good. (:

And please wake me up when December ends.
Cos i need a great getaway.

Ok, thats all for now.
I dont know when i will be back here again.
But i try to update real soon.

Take care everyone!

2010-06-21T15:31:00.003+08:00

Susila Ahmad grows up with canings, punishments and curfews.

But not once i regret it cos thats what makes me today. I love you papa! ♥

Happy Father's Day to all fathers!

papa used to be a very strict father.
especially when it comes to discpline.

a simple careless mistake can make me stay up
even till wee hours, till i get it all right especially my maths.
i remembered how he placed the cane and his belt right next to him,
when going through my homework with me.
not forgetting, the day he beat me up so badly just because
i brought home a friend's cute pencil.
and when i didnt come home on time, he locked me out of the house.
and when my handphone bills got increased, he reduced my school pocket money
and also terminated my line.
and when my marks got a point away from his expectations,
he made a big fuss out of it.
and when i wanted to buy those barbie dolls or toys,
i need to show him my superb results.

i hate being controlled.
i hate not being able to go out with friends till late.
i hate not being able to watch tv after certain timing.
i hate to stay up late and hear all his scoldings.
i hate being caned.
i hate every rule he set.

that was in the past.

but now, im glad.
im glad that he taught me that way.
im glad that he was strict in disciplining me.
im glad that he set high expectations for every subject that i take.

not even once i regret it.
cos of all that, i am here i am today.

i known ive not been telling you this,
but i truly love you papa. ♥
and of cos, mama too! ♥

Semoga dipanjangkan umur dan dimurahkan rezki. Amin.

2010-06-11T00:12:00.003+08:00

first of all, thanks loved ones especially beloved family
for making 5th June 2010 a successful one.
i truly appreciate all those helping hands.
the preparation, the planning,
the clearing of room, the fantastic cooking, the arragement of gifts,
the beatiful backdrop in the bedroom, the gorgeous make up,
the pretty outfit, the beautiful shots, the wonderful loved ones.
everything makes it a successful event.

two year contact.
it might be long, but im pretty sure the day will be here
without us realising.
to save money has never been easy.
to commit in a marriage has never been easy too.
may the upcoming courses bring us closer and understand each other better.
more ups and downs. may we take it all as a challenge.
cos He never test us beyond our wills.

i thank you Allah for everything.
thank you for the smooth ride.

engagement is a step ahead.
a step ahead towards marriage.

may God willing.
two years down the road, you will see us holding hand to hand
walking down the aisle wearing gorgeous outfit.

and years to come, you shall see our juniors.
may we be granted health and longer years to live.

talking about all this is making me so impatient.
im getting more and more excited.
im getting anxious myself.
if only there's a fast forward button, i would have already
press it and get it all started.

its double happiness now.
engagement is a successful one.
came another big day shortly after, which i never
expected it to have been here so fast.
it did and its over.
thank you CDC for leading the way in riding bigger bike.
ive successfully completed the course.
im awared Class 2a license.
all im left now is Class 3 and then i shall put
it to a stop for the moment.

thank you honeyy for all those things that you have done.
its you who showed me the way back to school and im happy
enough to say that im a higher nitec graduate.
although its the lowest qualification but at least i
made it through.
its you who pushed me through learning on how to ride a bike.
from not knowing how to ride, now im already able
to ride a 400cc bike.
its you who made me who i am today.

you never fail to support me in everything you do.
you never fail to pick me up when i fall.
you never fail to put a smile on my face.
you never fail to comfort my tears.
you never fail to wipe away my tears.
you never dail to keep winning my heart.
not even once, you have failed.

no one knows how much we have went through,
both ups and downs, both sweet and sour.
nevertheless, we stood by each other.
we forgive and we forget.
even to the biggest mistakes,
mistakes are meant to be learnt and not repeated.

i thank you for the change in you.
i thank you for the better you now.
i thank you for every single thing.

i love you more than words could ever say.
im proud to say ive no regrets in knowing you.
i cant believe myself that we are making it till this far.
its a step ahead.
a step ahead in starting a family with you.

for the rest of my loved ones,
i love you guys more and more each day,
im happy enough to know that our friendship means alot
to one another.
just a simple gesture made us what we are now.
3 years and still counting.
lets treasure this friendship that we are having.
its normal to have misunderstandings and lil fights.
but too many of it cause harm.

so i truly hope if there is any of you who are unhappy
with certain things or people, just be open to talk to them
directly and bring it all up. keeping to yourself hurts.
its better to let it known to the other party and settle
it among yourselves and not involve others.

just some tips to maintain this beautiful friendship.

we have known each other for too long that along the way
we learnt each others' behaviour, attitude, strong and
weak points. dont take it as an advantage to yourself.
but take it as a tactic to tackle every situation. it helps.

years have passed.
i appreciate and treasure this friendship.
we have grown up together.
previously, most of us are still schooling.
all we did were chilling till late night almost everyday,
outings everywhere every night.
we were playful back then.
now all of us are leading a better future.
all tied with work.
now that everyone has different working shifts,
its never easy to meet up as one whole group.
but nevertheless, our friendship still stand strong.

maybe in years to come,
all of us will already be settling down
and have family on our own.
but i would still love to see all of us still hanging
around like what we are doing now.
maybe there would be more family activities.
our juniors will befriends with one another.

im picturing it too far now.
but im sure its gonna be fun~

lets keep this friendship going and may it lasts.
insyallah.
i love you guys alot and i cant afford to lose any of you.
in any point of time that ive done any mistakes,
be it words or actions, please forgive me.
i maybe harsh, i maybe rough.
whatever i do, i care. <3

2010-05-08T00:01:00.004+08:00

i know ive been missing for months.
ive been real busy with work and stuffs.
with too many things that happened recently.
ive just got no time to update this at all.

i dont know if this gonna be a long entry.
but bear with me.
il keep it short and sweet.

2010 has really been a good year.
but on top of those good start, i lost a few friends.
God loves them more.

Road traffic accident caused them death.
Rest in peace my dear friends.

Al Fatehah to Md Firdaus Bin Md Akhbar (10th Dec '87 - 2nd jan '10)
Al Fatehah to Nur Adilah Bte Md Adnan Tobing (23rd Feb '90-23rd Feb '10)
Al Fatehah to Abdul Shafaat (7th May '88 - 7th Apr '10)
Al Fatehah to Suhaimi Bin Saad (25th Apr '10)

ive been really really busy nowadays.
it seems like its been so long since i last pampered myself.
ive been pampering my family as well as loved ones nowadays.
for no particular reason.
maybe i just feel happy doing all those things.

since i last updated this blog of mine,
many many things happened.
let me just cut it short.

baby's training in hta is over.
he was first posted to star team, where he didnt make it.
so he landed himself in Golf Division, Marine Parade NPC.
its a good thing that he's near to me.
he said, its for the future as well.
cos one fine day when we are married, it will be much easier
for him to fetch me from my parent's place.
im glad and i didnt even expect him to say that.
he passed his class 2 TP on the first attempt.
and insyallah, he will be having bigger bike.
riding bikes, especially big bike is his passion.
as long as he is happy with it, im always fine.

for myself, ive decided to stay put in this job.
i dont deny i love my job. its just that at times,
im becoming more crazier with all those endless paperwork.
and ive completed all my lessons for Class 2A. and im waiting
patiently for my upcoming TP. i really cant wait for that cos
i cant wait to ride big bike!
pretty ladies on big bikes look gorgeous! im loving it!
and insyallah my dream will come true one fine day.
nothing much about myself actually.

and soon, its our engagement.
im not really that excited.
but its the people around me that makes me soo excited.
with loved ones (esp irritating sister) counting down for me.
with my mom keep asking me to be prepared as early as possible.
with all those wall posts on my FB.
with all of them talking about my big day.
it just excites me more and more each day.
im getting nervous myself.
im all prepared, just waiting for the day.
insyallah, things will go smoothly.

this coming july will be a trip to bali with loved ones.
too bad, honeyy need to cancel his flight as he cant
apply any leave during his probation. things wouldnt be the same
without him around. but im pretty sure, he wants me to enjoy myself.

soon after that will be my 21st.
can i have a suprise party please?
i dont know why people are getting so excited when it comes to 21st birthday.
isnt it the same old thing? you are just getting another year older.
i dont expect much for my 21st.
just a simple celebration will do.

too many dates this year that im looking forward to.
may 2010 continue to be a good, great year.

to all my loved ones who ride,
please please please ride safely.
i know no matter how safe we ride,
if accidents were to happen, it will.
but at least we did ride safely. :)

to honeyy,
im glad you love and enjoy your job.
it will be the same for another 4 years.
i will always give you my support mr policeman!
always think postive and look on the bright side of life.
we meet up real soon ok?
enjoy yourself at work.
take care and ride safely. love you.
ps. i just cant wait.

2010-01-20T22:13:00.005+08:00

committing suicide is not the way to end one's life.
in fact, when things didnt happen the way you want it
to be, you will just end up troubling your parents and others.
every problem has its solution.
running away from problems is running into it.
and in the end, you will feel bad yourself.

when you have a problem, try looking out for someone
who can be there to lend you his/her ears.
and if you really feel like no one can be there,
go out on your own to a relaxing place and cool yourself down.
be on your own, cry as much as you can and MAYBE
just scream as loud as you want.
but try not to do that in crowded places,
cos ended up you have all eyes over you.
unless if you dont mind.
somehow it will make you feel better.

ok, this is just a random one. haha.

now about myself.
the start has been a great one for me.
superb~
im sure more pretty and good things gonna come.
its just a matter of time.

talking things openly with my parents went so smoothly.
very supportive and very understanding.
i love~
i cant elaborate more for now.
just wait for the news ok.
it wont be so shocking afterall. :)

work has always been tiring.
piles of piles of work on my desk is hard to get rid of.
its never easy coping everything on my own.
but ive got no other choice.
for now, i think i will just stay put in this line.
i really need to save money badly for now.
maybe one fine day when i get a better offer,
i will take my leave.
but for now, i will just have to stay.

baby,
your training will come to an end soon.
after that, it will be a reality one.
i wish you good luck and all the best.
im sure you will make it through!
you will always have my support.
and ive been missing you so badly.
see you real soon.

loved ones,
im missing every single one of you too.
lets plan for an outing or meetup soon ya.

for now,
good night everyone~ :)

2010-01-06T22:34:00.005+08:00

im kinda tired to keep answering
people's questions on whether i've cut
my hair short and why i did so.

ok, let me say this.
hopefully for the last time:

Yes, i've cut my hair short.
And its because i wanna put
aside all those 2009 badluck.
:)

ok ok, enough of that.

i just feel like blogging today.
dont ask me why.
haha.
just a short and simple one.

may 2010 be a better year for all of us.

to loved ones,
ive uploaded all those pics in my multiply.
so feel free to steal and tag and whatsoever ok.

to babylove,
im soo missing you badly.
faster come back!

2010-01-02T18:57:00.003+08:00

Our condolences to the family of
Firdaus Mohd.

Al-Fatehah to you, our dear friend.
May You Rest in Peace.

You will be remembered in our hearts.
We'll be missing you.

2010-01-02T18:09:00.003+08:00

Thank You 2009.
Hello 2010~

Life is the sum of experiences that we encounter as we go through life.
Day to day to struggles and triumphs are experienced
by all of the world's creatures.
As human beings, when we encounter a challenge,
we have freedom to choose how to react.
Every decision that we make leads us down another road.
We will never come to exactly the same crossroads.
Every decision the we make has significance.

New year is a time to celebrate new beginnings.
It is time to celebrate having a clean slate.
Anything is possible because the past doesn't even matter anymore.
A new year, a new resolution.
Put the past behind, learn from those mistakes
and have a good and great future ahead.

New year. New beginnings.
i had a superb haircut that is loved by him.
a short haircut.
i cant believe i did it.
and im missing my super long hair badly now.
had a new phone too.
gave mine to my dad and he gave his to my sis
while i got myself a new normal phone, Nokia E66.
ive also got him a new watch that he wanted badly.
a watch that gonna bring him to the next moment.

this is just a start of the year.
very soon, more good things will come.
and when that happens, more responsibilities
one has to bear.

May Allah Show us the Right Path.
Amin~

Have A Great Future Ahead..
Happy New Year Lovelies.
:)

2009-11-20T14:24:00.002+08:00

its been such a long time
since i last updated this blog of mine.

i have been enjoying life too much
with loved ones that ive forgotten to
write it all down in this diary.

nevertheless, life has been great
and doing better for me.

just a lil update.
if i were to put it all in words,
this entry will be super long. :)

days after days,
plans after plans.
without us realising it,
the day will be here soon.
yes, im excited but at the
same time, im afraid.
afraid that i cant handle it
all by myself.
its a relieved to tell mom slowly about it.
i know i havent been giving her enough lately.
but trust me, i will take care
of you till end of days.
i promise you that mom..
the other day, sister asked if im really
getting married and expressed her feelings.
she said, "We are sad cos we will be
losing a family member.."
and right after that, my lil baby brother
just turned to me with his sad face.
then i sat at a corner, holding
on strongly to my tears.

You are not losing a family member,
in fact its an addition. :)

i know ive not done much at home,
i know i have not been a good sister
to my younger siblings and have not been
a good daughter to my parents.
i am trying my best to change myself
to be a better person just before i
commit myself into greater responsiblities.

nevertheless, if i were to move out,
i will never forget where i come from
and who my loved ones are.

ok, enough of that
before i started shedding tears.
emotionally unstable. :)

work has been fine but tiring.
very soon i gotta take over my collegue
while she is away, studying and preparing
for her examninations.
i wonder how am i going to face all those
stress and work load.
may force be with me.

yesterday, exactly at tewelve
right after antm, i went down to my babyboy.
smiling away and feeling proud myself.
i remembered clearly how it all started.
i had it enrolled on my 18th birthday.
and started having those practicals.
for every practical, i had to repeat a few
times. some even up to five or six times.
many times i gave up, not wanting to
continue it all.
how i remembered Honeyy was always there
for me through it all.
he stood by me and never fail to keep
giving me support.
and here i am today, riding without the P plate
because of you and your support.
without your support, i dont think
i am riding till today.
i know a few times u nearly give up on me,
but you keep pushing me through it all.

i love you baby.
i really do..
thanks for your support all
this while.
you pushed me through every
single thing.
without you, im not gonna be
a lady rider.
without you, i wont be holding
on to my higher nitec certificate.
without you, i wont be serious here
working full time.
without you, i wont gonna know
how to be strong in facing this life.
without you, i wont know how
to control my stupid temper.

and without you, im lost.

i love you more than words could ever say.

no other days that i look forward to
except fridays.
i cant wait to spend precious
weekends with you~

2009-10-07T19:32:00.005+08:00

firstly,
Selamat Hari Raya Maaf Zahir dan Batin
to all.

finally im here to blog again.
been too busy and too lazy lately.
hari raya is slacking.
maybe cos im too lazy to go out to
the visiting. haha.
ive got so much to update here but
the moment i start typing, i lost it all.
stupid!

im on leave again today.
and ive been rotting myself at home.
wanted to go out but at the same time,
im feeling soo lazy to ride.
i dont wanna travel on public cos
when the bus is pack and full with inconsiderate
passengers, i get so irritated.
and i dont wanna end up wasting money on cab either.
so here i am, rotting away at home.

had quite a bad day just now.
next time round, i wont say a thing.
i will just keep myself shut and not utter a word.
when i didnt mean a thing, people thought i was
out to kill them.
i know clearly that im not at fault, yet im being blamed.
just remember a thing,
He is great.
even when you try to keep things from others,
in some ways, it will just lie down infront of you.
dont blame others for whatever mistakes you have done.
:)

ok, im uploading all photos in multiply now.
not too sure why i dont like uploading
it to my facebook.
and thats the reason why my facebook got only 2 albums.
hahaa.

i really cant wait for friday.
Mr Policeman will be out of camp to
spend quality time with me.
wuhoo~
come back quick love!
im waiting for u.
very soon, friday will come
and i know at the same time,
weekends will go without us realising.
but we will make good use of it right?
waiting for you.
i miss you soo badly.

2009-09-08T22:45:00.003+08:00

life is indeed not the same.
today is the first day.
the day when he was called up
to serve the nation as a regular policeman.
its not as easy for me, as ive
never been too far away from him.

nevertheless, i will learn how
to be more independent. i used to have him
to help me out with almost everything.
now, its time to do things on my own.
i cant keep asking him to decide for me
(like how he always did) now that he is
busy with his work.

well, this is just the start. and i must always
bear in mind that he is far, not
because he wanted it that way. but he needs to
earn that sum of money in order to
support me and the kids in future.

at times, i do feel the loneliness and emptyness.
and when that happens, without realising,
tears will be rolling down.
but im sure i will overcome this.

thanks to friends who actually called and
sms-ed me, asking how am i doing.
im doing great. it takes time for me to adapt to
this but im sure i will make it. :)
thanks for the concern.
love y'all~

ok, before tears roll down again,
i guess i better stop this entry.
must learn how to control this
emotions of mine.

baby,
dont u ever worry about me..
im old enough to take good care of myself.
dont worry too much.
friends are around and im well taken care of.
so dont worry.
im fine, i will get used to this very soon.
its a step ahead.
i do believe, this is the start of an easy life together.
i love you and i miss you.
and im looking forward to friday.
take good care of yourself.
just eat what they serve you.
you will get used to it, dont let yourself go hungry.
for now, good night.
loveyou.

fridays, please come quickly and not go away.

2009-08-23T21:46:00.012+08:00

congrats Fizah Meow~
after 8 months, finally uve got to ride with us.
wuhoo~
ride safe ya.

i think im falling sick.
ohh no!
saturday was just a normal day.
since it was a first day of the fasting month,
time seems to pass very slowly.
then later on met up with friends at
bike shop, then break fast at home.
went to CGH and lastly to Pasir Ris
for a bike-washing session.

its been so long since i last give baby a wash.
sorry my dear..
im too busy to take good care of your outlook.
but im thankful that you have
always been a good one to me.
i love u!

after the session, we chatted for a while
before we headed and rushed back home
cos the weather doesnt seem good at all.
halfway through the journey, we got trapped
in the super heavy rain. it was too heavy,
that i cant even see whats infront of me.
i was already drenched and shivering.
i couldnt even stay focused.
been splashed a few times.
it was the worst rainy day since i started riding.

i was too afraid.
i couldnt concentrate.
all i could do was whispering prayers
and praises of God.
but thank God, i was home safely.
Alhamdullilah.

im afraid i gonna fall sick.
i just cant afford to be sick again.
i need to work, i need to be strong
to fast and i need to be well enough for
the next day that i gonna face.

Ya Allah,
please forgive me for all sins
that ive done.
please grant me health.
please give me the strength.
please avoid any sickness for now.
i need to be strong
but whatever you gonna give,
im willing to accept it with open heart.
cos all those good things come from you.
and the bad ones are by oneself.
amin.

recently i bought Nokia E51 (no camera)
for honeyy. he was extremely happy upon
opening the wrapped box.
he wanted a MP3 so badly recently.
he said he needs entertainment as well
during his 6 months training.
and all this while, i have always wanted to
buy him the handphone model.
and finally i surprised him with one.

posing with his Nokia E51, with my edited photo
set as the wallpaper.

i wanted to pose with my Nokia 5800 too. hee.

to someone out there.
ive read your sms.
you are always forgiven and im just out
to disturb you. haha. so no worries k.
and yes u owe me. hmm. swensens please~
and ive learnt my lesson. of course i know how
to differentiate the white from the black.
so dont worry so much about me.
im matured enough to think and act.
i know uve got my interest at heart.
nevertheless, i do appreciate your concern
and presence all this while.
take care and we love you too. :)

to honeyy,
please stop the time from passing
too fast please.
days to your training is getting
closer and closer.
and we have never been that far
for a long time before.
i know, i know our love will
always be the same
eventhough we are far apart.
im sure i gonna miss you truck loads.
love you baby.

and im missing little naughty boy badly too.
come back quick~
and below are the shots of his cute lil actions.

2009-08-21T11:26:00.003+08:00

Happy Birthday
to
Khairuldin Mustafah.

May u succeed in everything you do.
and semoga dipanjangkan umur dan
dimurahkan rezeki.
Insyaallah.

2009-08-17T17:44:00.003+08:00

finally im updating my blog after for so long.
ohh god.
ive been too busy with work and life i guess.
too many things to update, now leaving me so
blank on where to start.
ok ok..

recently, a friend of mine nudged me in msn.
its been quite some time since i last
heard about her. we were from the same primary school,
we were best friends back then. we went into
the same secondary school, our friendship
gets even stronger although we didnt
attend same class. but we were in the same
netball team. we know each other for almost
13 years now.

yes, its been more than a decade.
but, it seems like we have been too busy
with our lives that we tend to forget one another.

she nudged and we asked about each other's life.
after a while, she sent me this:

"u know,i always wonder how we kinda drift apart after
sec sch days.i mean its kinda sad cos we were so close in the past."
"u knw, i've always have this idea about friendship
and thinkg back kan, like terkilan .
Of all the gd times,i didnt get to share it with my bestfriend.."

when i read it all, i was lost for words.
i didnt know what to say.
i know her too well. and she is a person
who seldom open up to others. but when she does that,
something is not right.

yes babe, i know that ive been too busy with
my own life. ive been too busy that ive
neglected my friends in a way or two.
im blank. im lost for words.
insyaallah, God's willing, we will
plan for a meet up soon.
for now, u take good care of yourself.
nevertheless, im a phone call away. :)

i dont know why, im getting emotional now.
i was watching this touching show when i
decided to put it to a pause to update my life stories.

ok ok, im addicted to watching Anugerah Shows in
youtube again and again. especially when Sarah Aqilah
performs. even honeyy said that im a stalker.
oh no no, i just love watching and listening to
her voice. yes, i fall in love with her voice~
she has a superb voice. her x factor will
bring her far and will make Singaporeans proud.

once again, Congrats to u, Sarah Aqilah for
being the champion. and Good Luck in everything you
do. we will always be here, supporting u. :)

ok next, ive got myself a new phone. i know im crazy.
previously i got myself a Samsung Preston which i
used it for like less than 2 weeks before i sold it off
to get myself a Nokia 5800. im loving the phone and its
features too much. all i need is a wireless lan,
then i can go surviving without my laptop! hahah.

without realising, im missing everyone.
dont ask me why.
getting too emotional already.
like someone told me, i must know how
to control my emotions.
i can cry even watching tv shows.
maybe im just born this way.
ive tried so hard to control it all,
but i just cant do it.
maybe i will just try harder. :)

less than a week, comes Ramadhan,
fasting month for the Muslims.
fasting means that we cant eat nor drink
nor doing anything that is not appropriate
in His eyes from dawn to dusk.
its a month of sacrificing and appreciating
what God has given to us as well.
in a way, we are doing it to make ourself
realise how lucky we are..
and during this month, we are supposed to
do good deeds, as the rewards are much more greater.

and ive taken end of this month to go for a holiday
to shop and relax myself. plan is still pending.
either taking a coach to Hatyai or riding up to
Genting Highlands.
and ive yet to inform my boss about my leave.
must do it by tomorrow.

lastly.
congrats to you, baby~
finally uve got the assurance.
i know you gonna make it this far.
saluting u, Mr Policeman!
hee.
and yes, engagement will be here soon.
and then comes our wedding plan.
phew.
i can imagine u wearing your white
uniform with rank, and im in white tube
dress with bouquet of red roses in my hands,
walking hand in hand on the red carpet with you.
goshh.
i really cant wait for that.
insyaallah. :)

ok, its late now.
i will upload pics to my multiply
and some to my upcoming entry!
i will be back soon.

goodnight and sweet dreams everyone.
i love you all!

2009-07-27T19:00:00.003+08:00

hours to 20th started with Swensens with
honeyy at Changi Airport Terminal 2.
then headed off to where he suprised me
with loving bears holding on to a diamond ring.
i love the suprise!

before that he insisted that he got no time to
buy me anything cos he will be ending work late.
so i wasnt looking forward to anything.
nevertheless, i was jumping for joy for what i saw.

the next day went to simpang bedok
with family for a small celebration.
before that, i felt something is not right with
my very own body. and yes, i tried going to
the toilet to let it all out, but nothing happens.

stomachache getting worst and worst when the night falls.
i visited the toilet almost every minute.
i cant help it. too much for me to take it
that i vomited quite a sum.
i knew it well i gonna fall sick.

the very next day, i went to visit the doctor
just a block away.
on that very sunday, i was supposed to
go for Fizah's brother's wedding,
but i just cant. i was too weak.
i went over to the clinic, got my medicine
and then at the same time Doctor
wanted to issue me with 3 days MC.
i said no and he insisted to give me 2 days.

and the whole day, i went lying around.
even when honeyy and friend came over,
i ignored them and just lied down and rest.

now im feeling a lil bit better,
not so much to be exact.
i hate not being able to do anything.
i had to take 7 tablets for thrice a day.
i hate medicine!
ive got no appetite to eat.
i only eat a small amount of food
every time just
to ensure that i dont get gastric upon
eating my medicine.

ohh God,
please give me strength
so that i will be stronger
to face each day.

please pray for my well-being
and that i will get well soon.

2009-07-27T18:58:00.003+08:00

Happy 20th
on
25 July.

Thanks to everyone for
the never-ending birthday wishes.
Do appreciate it all.
too many to list it all down.

Love you all.

2009-07-18T15:24:00.004+08:00

ive got something on my list.
something which i can just
stuff my wallet and handphone
in and just grab that during lunch time.
it will make my life easier~
haha.

but still not sure which color to
choose out of this four.
all four look nice. i cant be buying all four.
please help me!

and, i will be trading in
my new, less than 2 weeks old Samsung Preston
to Samsung Pixon.
yeahh!!

2009-07-18T00:09:00.002+08:00

finally im online to post a lil update
about this busy life of mine.
as per normal, been too busy working.
working too real hard.
working hard for the future, my future
and maybe, our future. :)
i just wanna ensure that i have
enough savings.
savings that can keep me going.
savings that i can depend on.

and when my kids say, "Mummy, i want this..",
i would get it for them.
i wouldnt mind spending on them.
and i wouldnt wanna say,
"Wait for mummy's pay and i'll get it for you."
i would love to see them smiling away.

ok, stop it. im being too fast forward now.
haha.
ok, ive got soo many things to settle
this coming months.
ive got insurance to pay up.
since im having a stable pay,
guess i already need to be independent,
no longer depend on my mom.
need to pay bike installment on my own.
and then at the same time, i have to fork
out my very own hard earned money
for my daily expenses.
gosh.
but i know, i will survive! :)

and by the way,
i took public to work today.
something wrong with my bike yesterday,
so i just wanna play safe, i wouldnt want
to get stuck somewhere before i even
reach work place.
i took an express straight bus from
home but THANKS LAH, it doesnt make
any difference with the normal, cheaper rate
bus ride.
morning bus ride was so irritating.
the bus driver drove like he never drive before!
terrible braking technique.
ugh!
and then later on, back from work,
i got much more irritated.
with idiots pushing people around just
to get into the bus. with uncivilised people
squeezing their way through standing passengers
on crowded bus.
you can simply see different attitude of people.
i would rather ride through bad traffic rather than
being squeezed and being pushed around!
i truly hate taking public!
but i know, i cant run from it.
no matter what, i still need it especially
when it comes to rainy days and when my bike
giving me problems.

my 20th coming.
but nevertheless, its just a normal
day when i was born years ago and
i dont ask much on that day. im just a year
older and that makes me a lil bit more mature! :)

im typing too long already.
i gotta end this real soon.
i need my rest~

goodnight everyone.

2009-07-11T13:29:00.001+08:00

Mama,
get well soon ya!

love you.

2009-07-11T12:51:00.002+08:00

Thanks Hana for this :)

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with the wedding plan! At the end, choose the people you want to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. Have great fun people!

1. How old are you?
20 this 25th

2. Are you single?
Single but unavailable. (haha.)

3. At what age do you think you'll get married?
Insya'allah, before 24.

4. Do you think you'll be marrying the person you are with now?
Insyallah. (Wuhoo!)

5. If not, who do you want to marry?
Noone.

6. Who will be your bridesmaid & best man?
No idea.

7. Do you want a garden/beach or traditional wedding?
Grand, superb beach wedding!

8. Where do you plan to go on honeymoon?
Paris!

9. How many guests do you think you'll invite?
If possible, all those that ive known.

10. Will that include your exes?
Not too sure.

11. How many layers of cake do you want?
I want 7 but its so ridiculous lar. and i might need
a stairs to climb up. so i guess, 3 is ok.

12. When do you want to get married, morning or evening?
I want 3days and 2nights wedding. but too bad, both side
doesnt even want to exceed half a day. so il make do with that.

13. Name the song/tune you'd like to play at your wedding.
Thank God I Found You & Make It Last Remix

14. Do you prefer fine dining or just normal spoon, fork and knife?
Fine dining!!

15. Champagne or red wine?
Champagne, so that we can shake it and pop it out.
(better not, mintak kene maki je dgn family. haha)

16. Honeymoon right after the wedding or days after the wedding?
Honeymoon right after is perfect but i guess its too soon
to get away from beloved family. (cheyy.. :))

17. Money or household items?
Both of course. No money, no household items.

18. How many kids would you like to have?
I would love to have as many as i can.
but finance plays a part too.

19. Will you record your honeymoon in DVD/CD?
Obviously! and il post it to show everyone!

20. Whose wedding plan would you like to know next?
Everyone. please please please.

2009-07-08T20:35:00.003+08:00

Happy 21st
to
honeyy!

a key to independence.
greater responsibilities
and more wiser.

semoga dipanjangkan umur
dan dimurahkan rezeki.

love u always my love~

ps. more coming our way :)

2009-07-05T13:57:00.003+08:00

it seems so fast that now is already July.
and ive yet to plan for honeyy's birthday celebration.
he wanted no surprise. i guess ive given him too
many surprises. haha. im really so blank for ideas now.
please give me some ideas!

work has been tiring. and mama has been very
supporting towards everything.
thanks mama for everything!
waking me up in the morning and never
fail to give up just to make sure i wake up
on time to go to work. love you mom!
and ive got this habit.
upon reaching home from work,
i complained to mama that im too tired
working and her reply will always be
"biasalah kata kerja, nak carik duit..
mana ada kerja tak penat.."
(in english: "its normal getting tired to earn
money. and there is no work which isnt tiring..")
and then, i place both my bag and helmet on the
coffee table, and without changing my office-wear,
i grab a plate of rice and dish and sit infront of the tv
and enjoy my meal.
hahaa.

ok enough of that.

to rosnah,
i do really hope you enjoy yourself yesterday.
and hopefully you are being fine with them
who ALWAYS talk nonsense. but i guess you
too cant stop laughing being around with us.
right right?
and ya, talking about the old times do make
us laugh our heads off. hahaha.
those memories are always being kept in me.
and please make sure to visit mama real soon ok?
maybe after your bali trip. (i hate you!)
hahaha. and im sure you are proud enough to
pillion a lady rider. and we still can laugh away
at things while on the road. haha.
till here, take care baby. i love you!

to baby,
the suit will be on its way.
insya'allah.
dont worry about that ok..
all we have to do is pray and hopefully
things go on well. i am pretty sure it
can be trusted.
and baby, i am always right here behind
you and supporting you in whatever you wanna do.
im happy as long as you are.
ig going back on track makes you happy,
i will be happy for you too. :)
and by the way, im too happy for you
right now already. too many good things
happen at one time. and im so getting impatient la!
haha. im soo missing you now. loveu.

i got to get ready already.
its sunday and most of my
relatives are coming over to
have a family gathering.

and yeah!
i got myself a new phone.
but at the same time, i feel like
buying another phone. but its kinda waste
of money and im supposed to save. im still
getting use to it and so far, its being so good to me.

2009-07-05T13:41:00.004+08:00

Happy Birthday
to
Nurrudin!

2009-06-27T13:04:00.004+08:00

finally its a saturday.

work has been a hectic.
but im still loving it all.
and im praying hard
i would be transferred to
somewhere nearer.
has to wait for approval.
*praying real hard*
been working longer
hours in the office.
alot of things to settle.
but im doing fine.

i really cant wait
for big big day to come.
please come here soon please.
and by then, im truly reserved! ♥
and then few years down the road,
im truly yours. ♥♥♥

birthdays coming.
still blank on what to buy
and what to do and whatever
plans to make.
still considering on booking
a chalet.
at the same time, feel like
going for a getaway.
still not sure yet.
everthing still pending.
and futhermore, im being too busy
lately that i overlook it.

one more thing which is so upsetting.
i didnt start a thing and now i saw
fingers pointing at me.
thank god, im being a stronger
girl now. or else, i wouldnt
wanna imagine what gonna happen.
nevertheless, everyone is being
forgiven. be it those big mistakes
you have done.
:)

"dan sesunguhnya fitnah itu lebih
dosa daripada membunuh orang.."

2009-06-21T20:20:00.003+08:00

now its time to
upload pictures
of my new haircut
after 15days since
i cut it.

please dont comment anything.
haha.

2009-06-21T17:53:00.003+08:00

Happy
Father's
Day
to
Papa.

and my condolonces to
Cik Mamat's family
for the loss of his father.

al-fatehah.
semoge roh nya dicucuri
rahmat dan ditempatkan
di samping orang-orang yang
beriman..
amin.

2009-06-20T20:22:00.003+08:00

thanks for yesterday honey.
i truly appreciate it.
especially the dunkin donuts!
didnt expect you to surprise
me with that.
however, that little thing
made my day.
:)
thanks sayang~

after a full service,
change a few things here and there,
now baby looks better.
and even feels great!
a few more things to do
and im done with it.
the smoothness and lightness
really makes me want to keep
riding him around.

i promise i will take good
care of you.

to honeyy,
its a step closer now.
i will always pray for it
and i am certainly sure
everything will go on smoothly.
no worries ok?
i really cant wait for it to happen.

missing my old ride.

2009-06-19T04:19:00.002+08:00

its nearly 5am now.
i am still having a very hard time
closing this tired eyes of mine to sleep.
migrane keeps coming back to me
and i have to stuff myself with
paracetamol each night without fail
before forcing myself to sleep.
but still at times, it didnt work.
im going to pay a visit to the doctor
this coming week.
hopefully things will be fine.

ohh eyes, please let me have my rest.
and migrane, please go away for now.
just this once, please leave me alone.
i need my rest.
i need to wake up early later on.
please please please.

just a lil update.
thanks for the night.
i really enjoyed
laughing my head off.
and its great to have an-adult-talk
with you baby.
and to you-know-who-you-are,
its just your feelings la..
dont you worry about that.
and calling me in the middle of the
night do keeps me accompany.
tho we talked shit. haha.

i wasnt in the mood to speed
back home like i always did.
so i went around less then 70km/h.
and upon reaching my place,
something happened.
i will just keep it to myself,
thinking that everything's alright now.

our birthdays are coming.
and ive yet to plan for a thing.
please give me some ideas.
ive been out of ideas lately.
will plan it real soon.
hopefully i will be able to
plan for something good.

its late already.
ive got only a few hours to
catch up with my sleep and then
i have to force myself to wake up.
its gonna be a hot weather tomorrow.
and hopefully i behave.

for now,
"Good night.. Sleep tight..
Dont let the bed bugs bite.."

~

2009-06-13T17:47:00.004+08:00

well done honey..
i give u a ten for your effort.
its gorgeous anyway.
and it will surely look superb on baby.
cant wait for monday!
it will sure pays off well.

and on the way home just now..
if im a second slower,
i think i would have ended up
lying on the road.
i was already turning right into
my carpark, and this blind driver
just drive ahead.
thank god, i was fast enough to
react and swift away.
and then i was like trembling
on the way up to home.
hello, i can sue you for not
giving way to me ok!
cant you see the stop line infront of you?
BLIND.

another saturday today.
last saturday was just
like a weekday.
had family dinner cum birthday
celebration at swensens.
im already at home by 11.
come on, its a saturday ok.
im like stucked at home last week.
had a stupid useless argument with honey.
so all plans got cancelled.

so today, comes another saturday!
i dont want it to be wasted again.
in the past, saturdays used to be a
happening day~
clubs, drinking sessions, movies,
money-wasting activities, adventures
and the list just goes on.
now that we have gone to every part of
Singapore, i just feel that there are no
other new places to go to.
maybe new activities will be great to be
done together.
we shall see about that.

and today we shall go...
suprise everyone!
haha.

i went online in msn just now.
i was shocked when this one soul,
came nudging on my window..
as per normal, asked if im doing fine
and of cos ive said that im doing great.
and the very next thing, this soul
apologising to me, if he/she has done
anything wrong.
of course, apologies accepted.
but the weird thing is that, i cant
remember if he/she has done anything
wrong. just hoping that he/she
is ok. :)

i feel like changing a new blog skin.
ive just changed this current skin like
a few months ago and now im doing it again.
GOSH.
and this current skin actually took
me days to eventually look perfect.
will just go on browsing.
i just want a simple one.
but pink is a must!

i want pink decals for my bike too~

2009-06-12T20:18:00.002+08:00

im so tired today~

went out, riding around from
morning till late evening.
first to science park drive,
then to jurong.
after jurong, rushed back to simei
and then to lavender where i
spent my 'impatient moments'
with that china girl who doesnt know
how to speak english and keeps throwing
tantrums for God knows why.
and then to honey's workplace at
singpost then to unique motorsports
and then
Home Sweet Home.

packed schedule of today.

my patience has its limits.
u treat me well, i treat u well.
u give me stupid faces, i give
u even worst.
u wanna talk behind my back,
go ahead cos i cant be bothered.
seriously, i dont even care
cos you are just attracting peoples' attention.
so be it.

im a step nearer to becoming a mad woman today.
the weather is sorching hot.
and when that happens,
one tends to get out of control.
but thank god, im being very patient today.

thanks bro for the accompany~
and didi, its nice terserempak-ing with u.

and those little kids have just gone home.
and my home sounds so quiet today.
its nice to have them around at times.
they will make your day, but at times
just irritate you away.

its been so long since i last
updated my post with a long entry.
so much things to say, but once
i start typing, i get lost myself.
dumb dumb.

ive got so many things in mind right now.
i want pink decals for my bike.
i want a new camera.
i want a whole new set of clothes in
a new wardrobe.
i want to go for a getaway.
i want this,
and
i want that.
and the list goes on and on.

but only one thing that i need,
its you.

and ive long got it.

:)

im crapping already.
i gonna have my 3-in-1 meals.
its already 8.40pm.
i still havent had any breakfast,
lunch or even dinner.
before i throw tantrums
on this new laptop of mine,
i better get going.

life has been fine.

2009-06-09T19:38:00.002+08:00

congratulations baby!
im sure it will be a success.

"yes sir!"

missing you every second.

2009-06-09T19:35:00.001+08:00

new haircut.

and i

looked

fat.

but still, im being loved!

2009-06-08T17:06:00.000+08:00

BIG

Day

coming

REAL

soon.

2009-06-08T17:04:00.003+08:00

Happy Birthday
to
Papa
and
Brother Dzul!

sorry for not updating
for quite some time.
laptop was really down.
finally get a new lappie!
thanks pa!
:)

2009-05-23T14:30:00.003+08:00

Facebook-ing is

addictive!

im so loving it.

astepcloser.

2009-05-04T17:25:00.002+08:00

strong emotions
leads to crying.

c r y i n g
makes
you
feel
g r e a t ~

so much for me to take it
that i broke into tears today.

2009-04-03T16:56:00.004+08:00

Finally.
Finally.
Finally.

the day will come real soon.

the day that i have been waiting
for quite so long.

i cant wait for that special moment
to have it all back.

its mine.
will always be mine.
i love you.
and i truly miss you.

thedayisnearyetsofar

2009-04-03T16:47:00.004+08:00

1st April 2009

were not able to have a good sleep
the very night before.
woke up with "7 New Messages Received".
im too afraid to face the truth.
but i know ive got to face it eventually.
so i read all other messages from others
except for that one and only message that
i have been waiting for.
i recited some prayers.
i hold my breath.
i put my hand over my handphone screen.
i read letter by letter.
and
PHEW!
i managed to get through.
wanting to know more,
i went into the website and
checked it out.
how nice it is to read,
"Awarded with Higher Nitec in Accounting".
i passed~

:)

2009-03-31T13:17:00.003+08:00

i really must start putting
effort in looking for a job.
gosh.
i cant be staying at home
and then go out whenever i feel
like going out.
and the just go out chilling and
wasting money.
im already living barely on
my savings.
ouhh god.

results are coming out
real soon.
and then it will determine
if i really am graduating
with a cert in
Higher Nitec in Accounting.
another big headache~

i will be riding real soon.
and guess what?
its still gonna be my bike!
wuhoo!
i cant wait for the day.
it has been exact one month
for me for not riding.
hopefully i didnt get myself
confuse with the throttle
and the clutch.
haha.
the day is coming real soon.
im just waiting patiently
for the call from my workshop.

to din,
i read up your blog.
like ive told you din,
whatever you are doing for her,
there is nothing you can get
or gain from it.
engagement is already a step
nearer to marriage bro..
she may not be happy in the past.
but can you tell if she is not
even is she is smilling herself
away in photos taken and uploaded?
i know how much it feels and i
might probably know how much
it feels..
i know it wont gonna be easy for you..
maybe you just need to open up
and be in love with someone new.
:)
and ya, im just a call away.

missingthoserides.

2009-03-25T03:38:00.005+08:00

Loves her rides too!

2009-03-20T18:12:00.002+08:00

i knew things would go
wrong when honeyy said he wanted
to go over to the bike worskshop,
as there are some complications
and it would be best if he comes over.
and i was praying hard.
and the next thing i knew was that
i was given two choices.

to repair my bike
or to have a new bike.

if i choose to repair my bike,
it wouldnt be as safe.
the body frame was dented.
it can be amended but
amending it wouldnt be as strong.
if i choose a new bike,
its still gonna be Yamaha 125z,
still a second-hand bike but
the difference is its COE that
is ending a year earlier.
the installment months
as well as its payment are the same.
its just that i don't have to go
that shop anymore.
ive got a new shop!

the model of the bike might
be the same.
but it wont gonna be same
as my bike.
i love riding my bike.
the smoothness, the lightness,
the superbness and whatsoever.

still deciding.

baby,
you dont have to be sorry
for all those things that happened.
i dont blame you at all
for the accident that occured on
1st March 2009.
im glad to hear your suggestions
just now, moments before
i decided to blog my thoughts
and feelings.
you said, "I would love you to have
a new bike as its accident-free.
You can have your old bike if you want
to but bear in mind, its an accident-bike.
I wouldnt want anything to happen
to you and i want you
to enjoy riding."
i tried so hard to hold onto
my tears but..

i miss you babyboy.
i truly miss you.
i miss riding you.
i miss washing you.
i miss waxing you.
i miss talking to you.
you will always be kept
close to my heart.
:(

in memory,
FX 9328 Z
Y 125 z

2009-03-17T02:56:00.003+08:00

im being so
e m o t i o n a l .
without realising, im
sheding tears while blogging.
ouhh god.
whats happening.
ive got no answers for all this.
it happened so fast
that how i wish i could
just turn back time.
maybe its time for me
to pull out myself from
all this things and just
be on my own, away from
everyone.

to that someone,
im sorry if u feel
that i didnt tell you
anything about it.
i didnt know about
it at all till everything
just go on exploding
like that.
im really so sorry about it bro..
please dont take it too hard.
things always happen this
way in friendships.
and i hope you dont feel
bad about it all.
please dont keep yourself
away from us.
and i truly hope you dont
regret mixing around with
my clan.
however, you know that
fad and hafiz and even myself
will be there.
im sorry on behalf on
my friends for the disputes.
they might have their own
reasons for not telling you directly.
i hope this will settle down.
please cheer up dinC..
:)
we will be there whenever you
are in need.

babe,
first of all, let me apologise to
you before i start on anything.
i think its not appropriate for
you to keep yourself silent from me.
you know how many times i messaged
you but you kept yourself silent
instead. i know something isnt right
there. i know you too well.
but maybe i dont realise
certain things halfway.
for whatever ive done,
im sorry. im lost for words.
we used to share things the
way we like it to be.
every single thing.
but not anymore now.
i dont blame you.
now i hope you realise
that sharing things with others
isnt going to be the same as sharing
things with me.
i will be a call away.
:)

to those whom it may concern,
please try not to mix your personal
problems with others.
im trying to be general here.
no pin-pointing at all.
its time to sit down and think
what have we done all this while.
the way we talk, the way we react,
the way we joke, the way we do
things and any other ways.
all those things that we have done.
just sit down and think and
hopefully we realise our
mistakes even its a small
lil one.

i myself know that ive talked rudely
to others before, i joked too harsh
that people cant take it, i reacted so
badly that people just hate it and i even
hurt that one's feelings without
even realising it. i know at times
my lil actions as well as my lil
words do hurt others.
so for now, im taking this time
to actually apologise to all those
ive hurt before.
i dont mean it in any way.
im so sorry.

im just being soo emotional
right now, at this stupid hour.
i am not feeling so well.
having bad sorethroat.
bad running nose.
bad headache.
bad fever.
and feeling so badly sick!

honeyy,
i think its time to go for
a getaway again. lets plan something.
we need to take a break somewhere.
just have a fresh air and just enjoy ourselves.
shall we?

hopefully things will be fine
between all my loved ones.
:(

2009-03-11T13:43:00.004+08:00

it feels so great!
ahhh!
finally.
finally it comes to an end.
last paper of exam just ended today.
auditing.
it wasnt that bad after all.
finally i can kiss goodbye
to ite college east.
i don't intend to further
my studies for time being.
hopefully i will be graduated
with the long-awaited cert.
Higher Nitec in Accounting.
just hoping real hard that i
pass both modules.
just have to wait patiently
for the day of truth.

hmm..
for now, i have to start
planning for the future.
i need to get started in
finding a good job that i
gonna love and stick to it.
savings have to be in.
future plannings must get started.
more things to come in the future.

everything is doing great now.
honey has been recovering so well
that he simply look way way better
then the way he look before (i mean
before the accident).
all stitches of him has been removed.
no more ugly scars on his face.
even his abrasions are all dried up.
well, i really didnt expect him
to get well so soon.
nevertheless, i thank god
for the speedy recovery.
and guess what?
he started riding few days back.
now ive got no bike to look out
of my window like i always did.
before the accident, i used to
have my bike parked there
at lot 21. on that very fateful
day, honeyy wanted to use my bike
for his delivery work
and so he parked his at lot 20.
for nearly a week it has been there.
he wasnt fit to ride at all.
but he just started riding again
few days back.
now the whole lot is empty.
and babyboy has been at the
workshop for quite sometime.
all i do is to keep waiting for the
workshop to give us a call.
well, i truly miss riding.
i truly miss him.
all i have is the photos of him.
that i look at each night without fail.
no worries.
im a strong girl!
:)

baby,
dont you ever feel bad for what you
have done to my lovely bike.
he has been good so far.
but maybe not, on that
fateful day.
i thank god every moment
nowadays.
thanking him for giving
you a chance
to live once again.
thanking him for giving me you.
i just cant leave without you.
and you have been great so far.
im loving it!
and its been sometimes for mbs.
we will go for it soon ok?
i promise you.

2009-03-05T00:25:00.002+08:00

1st March 2009.

11:59pm.
the day that will be kept as memories.
i still remember it clearly.
and how i wish it was all a
n i g h t m a r e .

i was busy helping Din pasting
some tinted film on his car when
Fad gave
me a call.
Honeyy was involved in an
a c c i d e n t.
And within that moment,
both Din and myself rushed
over to Al-Ameen, as told by Fad.
Over, we saw nothing
and called Fad up again.
It was supposed to be at
East Coast Road, a few minutes
walk from my place.
We rushed over.
Tears was already uncontrollable.
Hoping and praying real hard that
Honeyy is doing fine.
Upon reaching, the ambulance was
just about to take a move.
I was in a state of shock that
i wasnt sure what to do.
I saw a group of busybodies.
I saw my bike in pieces.
I saw the stupid driver.
I saw the van.
And i saw the pool of blood.
If Fad didnt give me the wrong
information, i guess i would have reach
in time, and be there right beside him.

Police asked for my particulars
but i didnt bring any. So, Din
rushed to my place and I quickly
changed my shorts. I was at loss.
But thank God, friends like Din, Fad
and Ajip were there to help me out.
They helped me took some pictures of
the aftermath as well.

Upon reaching CGH, rushed down to
A&E and waited along with honeyy's parents.
Some friends came down too.
The moment, the nurses pushed him out,
tears started rolling. Blood was too much on
his face. I couldnt control myself.
And it was even emotional, when he said
"Im sorry for what ive done to your bike.."
Tears just cant stop rolling.
Stayed over at the hospital till late dawn.

Every night without fail,
i pray for him to get well soon, i
thank God for saving him,
i look at all the pictures taken after the
accident, hear and watch the video of him
karaoke-ing, hug the pooh (gift from him)
and never fail to stop sheding tears.
That was all that i could do.
Been having a hard time closing
my eyes to sleep.

Its hurting to leave him all alone
in his ward. Its even more hurting
to see him in that state. Lips has two
stitches while his chin has four. Both
legs full of abrasions. I hate the driver
for being blind and collided with Honeyy.
We all know it well that Honeyy hasnt
done any wrong. He wasnt speeding,
he was just going straight and there
the inconsiderate driver went into his
lane. And now, the one suffering all
those injuries is Honeyy.

Baby,
it truly hurts to see you that way.
The way u suck your drink through the
flexible straw, the way u slowly bring the
spoon to your mouth, the way u eat your
meals, the way you walk and the way you
struggling with your pain.
Ive been praying every moment for
you to get well soon. Ive been thanking
God for saving you baby..
Insyallah you'll recover real soon..
I wouldnt want to imagine life without
you baby.. I cant even afford to lose you
one day. Get well soon honeyy..

tears to accompany my night.

2009-02-13T04:08:00.002+08:00

its amazing how mouth to mouth
can tell different stories..
people will just make stories
up especially when you are just
being happy yourself.
why must human beings be that way?

at first i was upset with all
those things. but thinking again,
i cant be bothered.
so be it with whatever people
want to say about me..
as long as i'm happy.
furthermore, ive got my loved
ones around me especially honeyy.
love will b there when i am in need,
both ups and downs.

and i am thankful
that there is always someone out
there that i can turn to whenever
i feel like im all alone by myself.

to honeyy,
sorry for not telling u that
im going online.
i cant close my eyes to sleep.
so i go on blogging.
but i will go off to bed real soon.

to serine,
please take care of yourself babe.
don't over drink and get drunk,
not remembering a thing ya..
i will see you real soon.
enjoy your trip~

so be it.

2009-02-05T06:17:00.002+08:00

i don't know why
she keep picking on me lately.
and im sick and tired of all those
scoldings and never-ending-naggings.
why me?
its already 620 a.m.
i just want to have my beauty sleep.
can't i?
i am really being so
e m o t i o n a l
right now.

loss.

at times i feel as if i am
the only one that got more
and more scoldings from her.
i may be the eldest,
but that doesnt mean i must
bear all the naggings.
i dont know.

i feel like crying badly now.

i'll just cry myself to sleep.

2009-02-01T23:51:00.002+08:00

at times when things keep
running back to you,
all you have to do is to keep
s m i l i n g . .
smile as wide as you can while
all those memories keep coming
back to you non-stop.

i was online in msn.
and for no reason i just feel
like saying HI to all
my secondary schoolmates.
gosh.
everything happened too fast.
time just keep flying without
even you realising it!
gosh.
i last graduated from Springfield
was like three years ago.
that was when i was about 16.
and now im twenty this year!
ohh God~
its too fast to be true..

chatted with a few of them.
some already started working,
some graduating just like me,
some completing NS soon and
some even can't stop talking
about those days.

i cant stop smilling myself infront
of the laptop. i seriously cant.
however, i really do miss those times.
but certain things are not meant to
be remembered, like those fooling days
of mine. haha.

to ANIS RIFDIE,
this is specially for you.
haha.
sengaje nak kacau kau ajek..
bole?
haha.
erm.. i guess you just have to take it
s l o w . .
be friends with her and then start to
get a lil closer to her.
things will change if she meant to be yours.
but dont ever try to rush things through.
i know it well you wont.
at times you just have to be
patient.
i cant wait to see that girl!
haha.
its been sometimes right?
ok lar, i better stop all this.
just wishing you all the best
and may u succeed in life.

im seriously missing those days.

honeyy,
please be patient too..
i will accompany you tomorrow
thats for sure.
you musnt rush things.
you know it well what happened the other
time when you really wanted to down that
stupid Wave.
now that you are going to down a Spec3,
i hope you will be more patient ya.
and yeahh~
i can stop riding on my own.
i can start being your pillion
once again.
wuhoO~
i cant wait for that.

ok,
im late for something.
i better be out for now.

every single thing
seems to happen too fast.
and now its already February.
gosh.

2009-01-30T05:34:00.002+08:00

i am feeling so lethargic
right now, at this moment.
tired of sheding endless tears.
thanks to the malay series that i
have been watching
snce this afternoon.
and now the clock is showing 5:37 am.
and i am still watching it.
now putting it to a pause.
soon, i will go off to bed.

i still remembered clearly
the first time i watched
the malay series,
"Laila Majnun" .
that was in Kuala Lumpur,
in the Grand Continential
that my Tjs and I stayed in.
that was when we
started watching it.

since i have got no malaysia
channel or anything like that,
i watched it through
youtube.
watch it guys..
i gurantee you all that its a good show.
i cant stop crying watching it
episode by episode.
it really touch people's hearts.

a show whereby this girl grows up
with a bad past of hers but still she
is being very strong facing it all.
i truly envy her character.

thats all for now.
i will continue watching it and
then off to bed.

i miss you badly baby.
super four is on its way~

2009-01-26T11:25:00.002+08:00

first of all,

H a p p y
N e w
Y e a r
t o
e v e r y o n e !

i cant go on blogging lately
due to some technical fault.
however, let me just update
a few things.

last year, i had a fantastic
time with some of my TJs.
it was a trip to kuala lumpur
and pulai springs resort.
it was a drive-up by honeyy..
the trip was superb that im loss
for words now.
just check out my multiply for
all photos taken.
camwhoring was like every moment!
im looking forward to
more overseas trips.
wuhoooo!

school has started few weeks ago.
but i only started it
on my own way
recently. i am not sure why and i would
not want to know whats the reason.
but after getting a very
good scolding from mama,
i realised i just need to get
up from my lazy ass
and get started and buck up.
its a few more weeks to go and
then to
g r a d u a t i o n !
i cant wait for that.

its a step closer for me and honeyy.
there's more to come..
but preparation would not be that easy.
may Allah bless our relationship and
hopefully things will go in a good way.
insya'allah.

now i'm blank for words.
will update soon.

check out my multiply.
i've uploaded quite a number of albums.

im loving it!

2008-12-20T13:09:00.002+08:00

ive been too busy lately.
its school holidays,
but im too busy working.
working hard for much more
upcoming outings, events and occasions.
insyallah.

its a day away from my getaway.
very first trip with tjs that was
being well-planned by loves.
especially honeyy.
and the planning process
wasnt great ok.
we had to go through arguments,
misunderstandings
and stuffs like that. its u g l y !
but thank god, everything has
been well planned.
now we just have to wait for the big day!
w u h o o ! !

ok, ive been wanting to have a
i-phone! but the price really
gonna kill me!!
ugh.
forget about it.
ive been changing phones lately.
my phone got wet in my pocket
when i was riding in heavy rain
one day. and it just got spoilt.
sobsob.
stoopid me for not wanting to
stop by the side. and sh*t happens.
and i really need to get a new phone
after i come back from KL.
and honeyy promised to get me
a N95. but the cost is a bomb too.
haha. maybe i will just change my mind
to get something cheaper..

ok im done with all that.
after this i gotta pack my bag for the
trip and then i gotta siap2
to go to work.
come on, its a saturday!
but still, i got to work.
haish.
what a day!

to rusydi,
H a p p y
A d v a n c e
B i r t h d a y
B r o !
we wont be here to celebrate
it with you.
but trust me, we gonna
bottoms up
just for you on your big day! haha.

to kl troopers,
its a day away.
and i really cant wait for it all!
we have planned so far,
please do enjoy!
shopping till we drop.
makan-makan till we drop.
and anything that can be
done to drop us.
nonsense me! haha.

to babyboy,
i wont be able to ride u for a week baby.
so please behave yourself when im not
around and please do not be mad at me
for doing so ok?
i dont want anything to happen to you.
:)

i will miss home.

2008-12-13T03:00:00.003+08:00

first of all,
i would like to
a p o l o g i z e
to honeyy for not
saying that i will be online.
i just cant close my eyes to sleep.
so i decided to blog and i promise
i will force myself to sleep after all this.

by the way,
ive not been feeling well lately.
and i HATE to fall sick!
whenever i fall sick, it always
going to be bad.
having bad sorethroat, bad voice,
bad fever, bad cough and bad running nose.
so bad that i feel so worst.
ugh!
thought of going to visit the doctor to
get some medicine.
but thinking again, why should i?
time will just heal.
hmmm..

and yes!
9 more days to KL trip with TJs!
i cant wait for that.
to those who are not going,
please pray that we'll go and come
back safely ya..
we'll not forget to grab something for you guys.
to fizah, its ok about backing out.
we truly understand.
maybe some other time ya..
no worries!

and one more thing,
being a lady rider seems to be
a good thing!
haha.
when friends are around,
they will take really good care
about us girls. some will be infront
and some at the back, just to escort you.
they will help to "block" the traffic just to
let you lane change. they will horn other
inconsiderate drivers just for you.
and the list goes on.
honeyy do that too.
he loves protecting me!
a lot of times, he just horn at
those foreign workers on the pick-up
for looking at me.
:)
and a lot of times, he gets angry at those
inconsiderate drivers for
putting me in a danger spot.
haha.
i just love riding!
and mama keep scolding me for
not being able to stay at home since
the day i started riding.
sorry mama!

honeyy going melaka later.
and im dead sure i will be
missing you like hell baby!
but its ok, i will just keep myself
busy so i wont be feeling so lonely.
:)
i will pray for ur safety.

times like this that i appreciate him more.
i do realise that.
hmph!
when he's around, we keep having
problems with each other.
keep having issues about everything.
but when he's going far away from me,
i got emotional myself at times.
holding back my tears now.
haish.

sayang, im sorry for all the misunderstandings
and arguments lately. it seems that
we always cant agree to
some things and that will then
be a sparkle to arguments.
im sorry to hurt you in anyway.
however, im trying to be a better girl.
whatever it is,
im truly in

l o v e

with you baby!
i remembered the day when
we spent some time together.
we joked and laughed together
ike nobody's business.
and then i realised we have not
done that for so long.
how i miss those things.
:)
haha.
ok enough of that.
by the way, enjoy your trip there.
i will be waiting for your comeback.
takecare honeyy.
love and miss eu!
ok im done with blogging.

will be forcing myself to sleep soon!

im working at 7!

ugh.

looking forward to KL trip!

2008-10-23T01:54:00.003+08:00

This special entry is for all
my dearest TJs.

Whenever someone asks me
how we actually met and started
this out, i smiled.
i smiled thinking how amazing
we actually met. its just
a miracle. its just something
that no one could ever imagine.
started out with collegues, friend's
bestfriend, friend's bestfriend's
cousin, friend's friend, friend's friend's
friend and so on.
thats how it all started.
confused?
well, we came from everywhere.
really.
we are not a group or a gang or anything.
we are just a group of friends from every
little part of the world.

i love thinking that ive got friends
out there that really cares and will
always be there when you are in need.
they never fail to put a smile on ur face.
and you will get scolded for doing
anything stupid.
only true friends do that.

i love guys from A to Z.
thats for sure.
we have been through alots.
and i really mean it when i say
A L O T S . .
we went through both ups and downs,
good and bad, sunshine and rain.
we are still here holding
strong to one another.
Yes!
be it arguments, conflicts, disputes,
misunderstanding, miscommunication
and whatsoever.
we have been through it all.
but still here we are standing tall.

19 october was set aside just for them.
all agreed to be angels that very day.
soo white and soo pure.

started at azie's place and off to ajip's sis'.
and den rain started pouring like it never
gonna stop but sill we carried on.
till when the rain started soo heavily,
everyone stopped at the rain shelter.
everyone still in drench, but i can clearly
see how cheerful they were.
i enjoyed myself as much.
as the rain started to slowly drop,
we continued to ajip's dad's place
in eunos den off to mine in siglap.
and rain started raining heavily again.
so everyone decided to stay a little longer
at my place before heading to aim's place
in bedok reservoir. next to rusyhdi's in sengkang
and den off back to fizah's sis'in bedok north
and den to kat's at tampines.
last place was simei. but still, there were 3houses.
wan's, din's and honeyy's.

and as usual, honeyy's place will be the
p e r f e c t
place for seeking forgiveness from one another.
this year was a little bit different
from last year.
since serine is the eldest among us,
she was asked to sit and so that
all those younger ones could go up
to her and ask for forgiveness.
and yar, of course i started crying even
before i start saying a word.
but i felt like an achievement when i
realised that i could actually ask for
forgiveness clearly to the others.
im really thankful.

seeking-for-forgiveness session has
always been a sobre one of course.
a mix emotions of happy and sad and touched.

but nevertheless, our day completed
with fun, smiles, laughter and joy.
not forgetting dozens of camwhoring!
every little thing that we do, for sure
there will be a flash. or maybe i should
say flashes. and i felt so so like a
s u p e r s t a r.
haha.

im done with that entry.
so, let me say a few words to
everyone of them.

Honeyy,
i love you more than words
could ever say b.. we have been
through alot together. both ups and
downs, you were there for me. and i never
afraid to shed tears, knowing that you will
wipe it for me and then hug me tight
to make me feel better. thanks for all those
sacrifices that you have done for me. i am not
sure how to repay all your kindness. but i am pretty
sure Allah is there to bless you honeyy.
there's nothing much for me to say to you
now cos you perfectly know how
much i care and love you.
i really look forward to be with you forever.

Serine,
you are the one that i comfortly confide in.
cos i know that you will never blame me
even if im at fault. and you always stand
up for my rights. rest assured, i will never forget
all those things that u have done.
i love you babe!

Din,
knowing you has been great. i remembered
sharing problems with you when i got fcuked
for no stupid reasons i thought. but when i think
again, i realise that you are the only one (besides yan)
who talks things into one's head and make them feel
soo bad and that they realise their mistakes and stuffs
like that. btw, i never say this to you, but i love you bro.

Kat,
we might not be as close. but sincerely,
i do love you. and i know at times or maybe
most of the times, we have misunderstood
each other. but i know that those anger
in our ownselves come and go. so, smile! maybe
we need a little bit more time to get to know
a little bit more about each other. only then
we'll understand each other better.

Aim,
you seldom come down for lepak-ing or
gathering. but i can see the difference in you from
last raya and this year. so much difference! you are
more rowdy now! haha. keep it up! do join us often ya.
btw, take good care of kat. if you need someone to talk to,
you can call anyone of us up.

Razif,
you are the only one who never fail to put
a smile on everyone's face. and you are the only one
who seldom show how much you hate or mad. cos you
always smile and laugh and joke around like nobody cares.
but one thing, do share with us if you need to.
cos you just love keeping it all to yourself. and ya, thanks
for always being there for me when i had problems myself.
we were at loss when we lost you. and please, dont ever leave
us again. i love you bro!

Sheikh,
i do understand the problem that you are facing.
but at times i feel that you need to be a little bit
defiant so that you will have a little freedom.
just a suggestion. anyway, knowing you has been great.
still remember clearly the day when i introduce you
to yan. haha. the day when u shed tears like a baby.
haha. ive seen u grown up maturely bro.
do join us often. btw, u still have not ask for forgiveness!!
we always miss you. love you too bro!

Fizah,
things started to get closer between us. and with you around,
the kecoh-ness is unbearable! kecoh giler! haha. well,
love the way u look, happy-go-lucky. but at times you
need to be open and speak up. don't keep it to yourself.
its not good. so if you feel troubled, call us up. i never say
this to you but i do love you!

Azie,
at times i feel that you are a too soft-hearted babe.
don't you worry so much about those little things
cos when that happens, it gonna affect your life badly.
trust me when i say that. i went through that a few times
but i decided to change that mindset. so, think of the
positive side of life whenever you feel that you are down.
i love you even if i didnt tell you.

Wan,
TJ is just a group of friends that enjoy lepak-ing, gathering
and stuffs like that. so i hope you don't get any wrong idea ya.
btw, its good to see that you have been together with khai
for quite sometime. we are happy for you!

Nisa,
there is nothing much for me to say to you.
maybe just this: do call us up whenever you are free ok?
we have yet to catch up with one another. so when you
think that you wanna meet up or lepak or sth, just beep
anyone up. btw, i do miss lepak-ing with you!

Rafi,
i can call you chipsmore anytime i want. cos u have always
been missing and nowhere to be seen. find sometime to spend
a little more time with us ya! and please take good care of nisa!

i think that's about all. i don't think i miss out anyone.
if i do, please tell me! haha. i love you guys so much that
im lost right now. so blank.

till we meet again.

sorry guys..
photos will be uploaded

very very soon.

.my apologies.

2008-10-04T06:16:00.002+08:00

Selamat Hari Raya
Maaf Zahir dan Batin
to all!

finally im here
blogging again.
its been such a long time.

Hari Raya this year
doesn't seem like other
past years.
i don't know why but it
seems so different.
but hopefully, things will get
well real soon.

first day of Raya, as per normal,
asking-for-forgiveness
has always been the most
h a r d e s t
part.
well, its a simple thing to do.
but at times, it
touches one's heart.
like me.
haha.
well, getting down on my knees,
holding my parent's hand and ask
them for forgiveness do make
me shed tears.
emotions then
started to strike!
phew!

kk, enough of that.
i know there are more things
to come that both me and
honeyy look forward to..
may Allah guides us through it all.

to my dear TJs,
i cant wait for our
Raya outing!
for those who have cameras,
p l e a s e
do not forget to bring
them along. and please make
sure that all photos
taken are well kept, and not
lost somewhere. alright?
(especially to Sheikh) haha.
kk, hopefully i will be able to
ask for forgivess with a sane
mind this year.
hahahah.

klar, i got to go for now.
will update when ive got the time.

2008-09-13T15:45:00.002+08:00

12-09-2008, friday
born of a babyboy.
alhamdullilah, he's healthy.

today is saturday.
i do really really hope that its not
going to be like the previous saturdayS!
saturday has been a boring day lately.
i dont know why.
but it seems that way especially
when everyone thinks of no plans.
ugh.

TJ will be having outing to
bazaar Geylang today after
break-fasting.
its been sometimes since we last
had our gathering.
miss you guys!
see y'all tonight!

finally exams are over!
school will resume on 13 Oct.
a few more months before i
wave goodbye to ite simei.
i dont wish to stay any longer there.
just need to study hard, pass all my
papers and grab my cert and thats
about all.
there musnt be any debar or fail.
or else, there will be no engagement for me!
ughh.
hopefully i make it through.

now is already the 13th day of fasting.
time flies too fast lately.
haha.
looking forward to my BIG day very soon.
will update again about that.
its nearly the mid month of Ramadhan.
Syawal will be here soon.
still ive not decided what colour to
wear this year with my family.
usually i will be the one deciding on
the colour and then mama will go around
looking for it and stuffs like that.
i am being so fickle minded right now.
red or white?
haha.
mama says red looks quite good
and white is common.
but the problem is,
will my brother agree to that?
and if he doesnt, mama thinks of
the ladies wearing red while the guys
wear white.
loyalty to our country.
:)
but both me and Honeyy had decided
on red for our couple set.
there is a reason for that.
last year with Tjs was black.
it will be white this year.
*why must it be red and white?*
w e i r d
haha.
our group photo looks pretty
especially with everyone wearing
the same colour. wuhoo!
cant wait for this year.
anyone with camera, please
make sure that ALL photos
are intact and not gonna get lost
anytime soon alright?
* thanks Sheikh for losing
all our pics! * haha.

ok ok.
im totally blank right now.
honeyy is still sleeping.
his mama and sisters just went
out to his grandpa's place.
now i have to wake him up
and off we go to nowhere.

will update both multiply
and blog soon.

2008-08-12T18:05:00.002+08:00

i was browsing all those things
when i realised tears are rolling.
i couldn't hold them back.
i don't know why.
im being too emotional lately.
these tears just love to
go out of control.
in fact, nothing was wrong.
stoopid me!
crying for no reason.

only God knows how i am feeling.

n only close friends and loved
ones know how emotional i can get.

i remembered last year Raya.
haha.
it was at honeyy's place.
something happened the day before
so i remained silent for that few hours.
not wanting to speak to anyone,
i just stared hard at the TV.
and then came Din stretching his
right hand to hold mine and says,
"Kakak, aku mintak..."
tears already started pouring heavily.
i can't control it any longer.
the 'asking-for-forgiveness-sesion'
then start.
ugh!
just cant stop shedding tears
from the start
till the end.
especially when its time to
ask for forgiveness from honey.
i was supposed to ask
forgiveness from everyone,
as i am the youngest.
but with that emotion of mine,
dearest friends have to come up
to me and ask.
sorry guys!
il try and do it this year alright?

saying about Raya,
less than a month to
our fasting month, Ramadhan.
how fast time flies.
at times how i wish i could turn
back time
but at times i wish not to
turn back those past and just
get going with life.
in few years to come,
il be celebrating it
with honeyy and kids and family.
how cool that is?
i cant wait for that.
if nothing holds us back,
we'll get engaged very soon.
will update the news again.

anyway,
when will school gonna end?
its less than a year now for
g r a d u a t i o n
but still, im not getting any better.
just hope to graduate fast
and not continue with studies.
but at times, i wish to continue
my studies in ACCA.
an accounting school.
just to be a certified accountant.
i love that module but i there are
things that i need to take note of.
there are always nad and good points.
both pros and cons.
may i succeed in whatever i
do in the near future.

ive been surfing the
net for too long.
as normal, ive not yet taken
my shower. will do so in a while.

honeyy, i love u more than
words could ever say..
the past will always be a history.
i don't even wish to bring it back.
all i wish to do now is to
look forward having a
happy and blissful life with you.
this relationship has taught me
lots of things.
i was hurt enough in the past.
and i don't blame life for that.
things always go around.
what goes around comes around.
and only God knows when.

till here then.
i
n e e d
to
have
my
shower
N O W!

~ honeyy, can i ask for more? ~

2008-08-08T12:59:00.001+08:00

bored.
haha.
now at pandan loop,
accompanying honeyy to
car servicing.
i want to go shopping
but he insisted that we have
to wait till the service is over.
that means i need to wait
2more hours before i can
go shopping?
ugh!

ok never mind then.

anyway, its been a long long time
since i last posted anything.
so many things happened.
but not in the mood to post it all.
haha.

and guess what my dearest friends.
ajip will be in hometown today!
yippee!!
we really miss you bro..
do call us up when you're out.
we have been waiting for you.
till here then.

*shopping mood*

2008-07-11T12:56:00.003+08:00

C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S
to
M U H A M M A D
R A Z I F
for
passing
his 2B
license.

but at the same time,
things just went wrong.
we wish him all the best in
whatever he do.
we will be here waiting
till its all over.

when i got the sms from
kat, i was loss without words.
i couldnt control that emotion
of mine and gave her a call
soon after that.
tears just welled up
during rides home.
how could that happen?
blank.
no one knows the right answer.

however, all the best to him.

losing a great friend is
unbelievable.
but everthing that happens
have its own reasons.
and maybe that's why
for the first TP,
he forgot his IC.
GOD has already planned
the best for us.
Insyallah he will be fine.

to all my other TJs,
lets not dwell on things like this.
i understand and pretty
sad too that we lost a great friend.
he will be back soon before we realise.
40 days? it sounds longer to him
than we thought it is.
but lets pray that he will be fine
and that he learn his lesson.
its just a lesson for him
to be learnt.
once he's back, we'll go for another
group outing alright??
maybe sentosa like what he has
planned fo us the last few days.
memories always stay.
we gonna miss you AJIP!

things always happen for a reason.

2008-07-09T18:53:00.001+08:00

H a p p y

2 0 t h

B i r t h d a y

t o

H o n e y y

again !

2008-07-09T18:17:00.002+08:00

its been a long long time again
since i last logged in and blog.
guess its time for me to blog again.

finally school's holiday is over!
can i not say goodbye to that?
when will school just gonna end?
ughh!!
school just started this week.
in fact, i was absent from school
for the first two days.
ive got two days mc!
i am not feeling well!
with sorethroat, running nose,
cough and rashes, i cant do much.
whenever i fall sick, i tend to
rest and sleep. cos i am just
too weak to do anything.
even if i do, i feel lethargic
too soon.
ugh!
went to school today and
there's so much for me to catch up.
having exam for my costing
tommorrow!
can i say no?
having to study both costing
and accounting, really drive me
c r a z y ! !

let me update on some things.

first of all,
honey passed his class 3 license
3weeks back.

secondly,
he got into an accident last
2weeks just before
meeting me up and he ended
up not going for his class 2A TP
the next very day.

then,
accompanied honeyy and clan
to Pasir Gudang.
he had to wear a bandage around
his ugly wounds just before wearing
his racing suit and boot.

so on and so forth.

so many outings i had
during the holiday.
too many to mention.

but recently, i had sentosa outing
with my jenayah!
we had fun, we had laughter
and we had joy!
view my multiply to see the pics taken!

im blank for now.
will update soon.

praying hard that i get well soon..

2008-06-12T15:29:00.002+08:00

things were fine on
that very day.
thank god!
and thanks to
beloved friends who were
concerned. some even sms-ed.
but many did ask about that.
thanks peeps!

so much tings happened lately.
firstly, few days back,
on tuesday night..
i had a bad experience
at one of the fast food
restaurant. thanks to the
stupid manager! i will be
complaining it to the above authority
after this. that's for sure!
how can she be so rude towards
a customer?
isn't a customer is always right?
the manager totally have no rights
to shout at a customer!
its a long story but
let me cut it short.
the manager initially was angry
with the riders and since i was
there, i got shouted for no
fcuking reason.
a complain is a must!

ok, enough of that stupid
experience!

yesterday, honeyy had a soccer
session with his bike clan.
and after tat, as usual,
we will be hanging and chilling
out before heading back home.
we were discussing to
go jb that night when a lady
came to us and asked "Can send me
to a nearest hotel?"
everyone looked at each other.
there were 7 of us, im the only girl.
we were like not hearing the right thing.
haha!
bt really, she was having some problems
with her husband and just need time
on her own.
well, that was not her first time.
she did that many times.
and so, some of us brought her
around and search for the cheapest
hotel rates for 2nights.
she treated us to beers and cigrattes.
and we hanged around till late
and off we went back home.
she looks young but she is already
married with two children.
but i guess, something is not
really right with her mental.

i was awaken with a loud noise
just now.
and guess what?
i atually cried when having
that stupid nightmares!
why do i keep having nightmares
lately?
is it because i didnt wash my
face and leg and seldom
say prayers before i close my
eyes to sleep and ended up
satan disturbs me!
phew!
i really dont want to
talk about that.
straight after i woke up,
i sms-ed honey.
sorry baby..
haha!

so many june babies
this year!
why?
haha.
and it came at the wrong
time cos im prety
b r o k e !
haha.
so, to ALL june babies
especially Papa, Brother Dzulboy,
Cousin Aidhil, Uncle Rashid
Happy Birthday!

ok, let me ask this.
am i not being appreciative?
im totally blank.
people always tend to look at
others' mistakes clearly.
i stopped for a while and
asked myself, am i not being
a p p r e c i a t i v e ?
but i didnt even bother my friends
with all the problems that
i am having.
i didnt even bother anyone
wheneva i am feeling low.
so what is it?

one by one of my beloved
friends started to change.
i mean, one by one is sulking
over little issue.
i know at times i am wrong,
but i did lower down my head,
put my ego aside and apologise.
ya, i am not the only one
having problems.
but the problem now is
i didnt bother my friends
with my own personal problems.
w e i r d .
let them be.
both me and honeyy will be away
one day and we will be sure
to remain silent.
at times its better to
remain silent.

to all my beloved friends,
i seldom say this.
but i truly love u guys!
and thanks for being there!
i do really hope our friendship
is like its beginning.
i hate it when one by one of us
keep sulking and get mad
at one another.
stop having that ego guys!
get this friendship going
as strong as it can be.
maybe its time for each one
of us to think what good and
bad we have done.
only then, we will
understand this friendship.
i love u guys!

ive got my own problems
to even bother about others.

2008-06-07T16:34:00.002+08:00

i was searching for my wallet
when my handphone beep.
ya, it was him.
never expected him to sms me..
he asked me to check my blog.
so i went reading it.

to my amaze, he actually post
e conversation that i typed in msn.
when i typed those things,
he remained quiet.
so, i logged out and
checked on my handphone.

indeed, there was one sms from him.
saying sorry for being rude and wish me
good afternoon. it was an hour ago.
if ive read that message earlier, i guess
we wont be arguing right now.

have bin crying since
yesterday night.
woke up with swollen
eyes and was asked
by mama. i had to lie,
saying that i didnt
have enough sleep
the day before.
but she knew i was lying
and she asked more
but i kept on saying
nothing was wrong.
went to sign in to msn
and started arguing again.
tears keep rolling.
i was sitting and chatting
outside my place.
with those tears rolling,
i cant hide it from my neighbour.
being too emotional, i went
signing out, checked my handphone,
searched for clothes and ironed it.
thought of going out.
called serine up if she got any plans.
meet up will be at somerset mrt at 6pm.
thinking again, i dont feel like going out
with anyone, i rather be alone.
so i sms-ed her, telling her that i will
be going out with my mom to
my aunt's place (in fact mama
has already went out hours ago).
i just need time on my own.

i am sorry for not
being understanding.
there are more
things for me to learn.
at times like this, i truly need
u by my side.
bt after all those things,
i never want to
put high hopes again.
i am sorry to pressure u
with all my tears.
i will try my best not to
tell u wheneva tears are rolling.
i will try to keep it to myself.
at least i am suffering it all
alone by myself.
im sorry once again.

i was supposed to go out by now.
but when i received his sms,
here i am reading and blogging.
thought of deleting that
entry that he post,
but i guess i will just leave it.
my make up has been smudged
by these stupid tears of mine.
i should touch up and get going.
for now, i guess i just remain
silent.

im sorry.

i hate it this way

SIMPLY FOR YOU

2008-06-07T15:53:00.003+08:00

©<>® says:
y do u alwys hv to do tis to me?
©<>® says:
y arent u bein man enuf to tok to me face to face?
©<>® says:
y cnt u simply put tt ego of urs aside?
©<>® says:
y do u hv to do al tis to tis relatnshp?
©<>® says:
its our 19mnths
©<>® says:
its indeed our 19th mths
©<>® says:
19mths since e dae we first went out togeta
©<>® says:
daes wen i wen to east coast park, marina south w u
©<>® says:
marina south, e place we called tempt nelayan
©<>® says:
where i cried my hart out n open up w u abt my probs
©<>® says:
since day one, we hv bin contactg each other
©<>® says:
mit up every single dae
©<>® says:
first acident was w u
©<>® says:
everytg was simply too sweet
©<>® says:
simply too sweet to even get erased easily
©<>® says:
den mths later tings started to change
©<>® says:
n til nw
©<>® says:
19mths later
©<>® says:
tho ups n dwns kip hapenin, we stil togeta
©<>® says:
i dunoe if its gona end anytym sn
©<>® says:
bt i noe, i wudnt wan it to
©<>® says:
im stil urs tho nt oficial til tis very date
©<>® says:
alwys tried my bes nt to argue w u
©<>® says:
alwys tried nt to shed tears
©<>® says:
alwys tried to undstn u
©<>® says:
bt til nw, i stil cnt b a gd gal
©<>® says:
i stil i m
©<>® says:
bein over senstive towards every single ting
©<>® says:
bein too childish
©<>® says:
bein too hot tempered
©<>® says:
bein too stoopid
©<>® says:
w al these tears, i cnt explain hw much i love n need u
©<>® says:
bt ul nv undtsn
©<>® says:
at tyms wen i need u too badly, n wen u js cudnt b dere
©<>® says:
i fil dwn
©<>® says:
ure only one i wish to b ryt beside me weneva im filin low
©<>® says:
ive gt no one else
©<>® says:
soo much to be said ryt nw
©<>® says:
w u bein silent, i cnt even blame
©<>® says:
its ok
©<>® says:
i reli hope u find me by either sms or kol
©<>® says:
tt wil reli make my dae
©<>® says:
im sorie for al those tings ive done to u
©<>® says:
bt truly, i cnt live w/o u
©<>® says:
i love n mish eu nw
©<>® says:
im sorie
©<>® says:
gtg

its my 1st tym blogging on her blog.
im sorie.
u mean a whole world to me.
its js been downs for tis rltnshp lately.
blame me.
i know im very egoistic at times.
i js dnt want u to tear up animore b.
basically, i need u.
i need u as much as u need me.
ive put u aside for too long cos im too tired frm work.
i know tts a lame excuse.
i know im nt gd enuf for u.
im always trying.
i swear i am.
do forgive me.
do msg me at my cell.
pls stop crying.
i stil love u.

n lastly....
happy 19mths anniversary.
love u baby.

-yanlovesin-

2008-06-05T21:26:00.004+08:00

well, i think i better start speaking
and writing good english. shall i?
haha.
its kinda weird to type out full word
unlike those shortcuts that people use in
normal sms.
w e i r d
haha.

ok ok.
quite a few things to be put up here.
first of all, one more week of school
and then il have time to enjoy!
still looking for a part-time job.
just to fill my time and
make money as well!
but because that im being fussy,
till now im searching!
haha.
should i work or should i not?

ok, ive received a warning
letter from school.
the letter is addressed
to my mom.
thought of just throwing
it away, but
thinking again, i think i
should just let her know.
she knows about my attendance.
but im pretty sure that
she will be shouting
at me sooner or later.
i just dont want to her to
go nagging for 3hours.

my care person renewed my scholarship!
so i will be getting another
$1,200 this year.
i remembered last year clearly.
was awarded scholarship but
i dont really
look forward to it cos im working
hard and my
pay was pretty good.
i earn about $350 per week..
it was my birthday.
mama called me up to
collect the cheque at a
nearby community centre..
so just before i go off to work,
i went to collect it
and bank it in. and on that
same day, i remember
i got my one week pay!
not forgetting, the savings
that ive got in my bank!
i WAS rich~
my birthday was superb..
honeyy got me a pink psp
and a rose of ferrero rocher!
since his birthday is
not too far from mine,
ive got him a silver psp too!
i wonder what it gonna
be like this year...
maybe a huge surprise party?
haha.
*dream on*

recently, i went blog-hopping.
i came across this blogger..
i used to read hers once
every few months..
so i went to check out whats new.
to my amaze, i saw a picture of a baby and
a poem (something about rest in peace).
but i wasnt sure what was it
so i went more into details.
i went looking at some of the
pictures uploaded.
i remembered the last time i
read her entry
was about her being pregnant
and giving birth soon.
n now 6months later, i read
about her story.
she's a strong mother, i can say.
her newborn was only one month
old when
he says goodbye to both
his parents.
the baby actually passed away
due to
some complications.
tears just rolled down as i
read her story.
it touches one's life.
i know it would never
be easy for her.
and through her entries,
i can say that
she is strong on the
outside but pretty
sure she's weaker than she is.
sobsob.

good news!
lovely kathieja just bring out
a super four version S.
cool shit!
and i envy her!
a girl riding a bigger bike will
turn guys' eyes 360 degrees!
wuHhooo..
when will my turn be?

ive been having this blogskin for
few years already. its time for me
to change a new, prettier one.
but the problem is,
IM FUSSY!
i want something simple
but pretty.
i want something
that has pink in it.
its hard to describe.
im still looking for
one but nothing
impresses me!
wait till i find the perfect one,
this blog of mine will
be more beautiful~

honeyy has been so crazy-in-love
with racing suits, boots, full-face
helmets and tracks!
trying to be a racer.
at times its kind of irritating
when he keep messaging me with all
those things, nothing else
matters to him now..
he and friends will be planning
for a race in
Pasir Gudang, Malaysia.
that will be the start of his journey..
but wait, more things to come in his way
before that race!
first wil be his class 3 TP, followed by
his class 2A.
but im confident enough he will make it..
im sure he would never dissapoint me..
wish u good luck honeyy!

for my beloved peeps..
remember our end-year holiday to KL?
do not forget to save up alright?
cant wait for that too..
hopefully things go on well.
we must never forget to bring digi-cams to
capture those moments!!

till den.

il try to blog soon.

inlovesyan

2008-05-18T21:37:00.002+08:00

im becomin more
h o t tempered.

y is tt so?
i feel bad towards
pple arnd me..
ughh!
im reli sorie..
i reli2 dunoe y m i
feelin tis wae n bhavin
so weirdly lately.
where cn i get e ans
to al tis?
ughH!
i get iritated so easily
by others n den il end up
getin mad for no reason!
its bin hapenin over n over again.

n at e same tym,
im becumin more
c l u m s y
each dae!
las thur, i went rushin to
skool s i was oreadi late for
my test.
so, i walked s fas i cud.
n gez wt hapens?
i trip over e stairs ryt in front of
skool gate, n its js opp e bustop!
n landed up lyk superman
on e ground!!
n had a smal cut on my left knee.
BOYS were lyk disturbin me arnd.
quickly, i picked my bag up
n walked off.
*ashamed*

its ok if it hapens once.
nw another incident..
honey n frens decided to
clean n wash their bikes on sat.
aft everytgs were over, honey
disturbed me.
n dere i was, chasin aft him.
aft quite a distant, i got quite near to him.
n i nv realised dere was a pudle of water
on e floor.
js s i was abt to grab his shoulder,
i landed flat on e floor.
n tis is worst!
ive gt bruises n wounds!
n my right fingers were numb
n kinda swollen!!!
ugh!
aft tt fal, everyone was lyk laughin
away at me!
damn-it!
n dere i was struglin w pain.
bt thank god honeyy was dere
to listen to my over exageratin moan!

n frens out dere!
those waiting for me to upload e pics,
ive oreadi uploaded sum on my multiply.
to serine, which pics do u wan me to upload?
haha.

kk, i gtg n eat. kinda starvin nw.

wil b goin to sentosa tmrw w my clan!
yipee!

2008-05-17T05:56:00.002+08:00

i woke up in e midle of e nyt.
n was havin trouble to get
bck to slip so i decided
to turn on my laptop
n started surfin e net
n nt forgetin to blog-hopin!
its nearly 6am nw..

once im done w tis entry,
il b goin of to bed!

let me start of w tis.
ystd, wasnt a dae to strt n end with..
i dunoe y..
tings oreadi started ugly since
im awake.
n it continued til late..
its sth tt i nv eva wanted.
im sorie for bein too selfish.
i shud hv understn better tt
ur werkin n tt ur tired..
howeva, everytgs fine ryt nw..

i went blog-hopin before typin tis entry.
once again, ive gt to sae..
soo much tings have hapened without
bein realised.

life is actuali simple n easy.
it is us who alwys make it so
complicated, so stressful.
live lyf to e fullest
is wt ppl alwys sae..
bt hw r u gona do it to e fulest
if u kip makin tings hard?
i noe n undstn tt it is easier said den done.
i do face problems myself.
i go get stressed myself.
i do shed tears wen im filin low.

n wen tt hapens, i alwys tink tt
life is a shit.

bt nw, s im blogin tis away..
i sudenly realise tt lyf isnt tt bad aft al.
its either u live for e dae or
u live for ur future.
n wil it b called life if we
dun have any obstacles to go tru?
hw i wish.

u cnt alwys wait for gd tings to cum to u.
its u, u hv to work n get it on ur own.

mama alwys remind me..
its alwys oryt if pple were to
do bad tings to us, bt nv2 do it
to others.
i nv agreed to tt at first.
bt wen i tink hard abt it,
nw i undrstn.

God is alwys dere to help
us wen we r in need.

frankly, ive bin hurt alot of tyms.
by frens, loved ones too..
n alot of tyms, i planned to hurt
dem teribly bad back.
revenge.
bt i alwys stop.
y shud i do it to dem?
ive bin hurt by dem.
y shud i return dem w wt dey
hv done js simply to get myself satisfied?
ive bin hurt n i wudnt wan dem to
b hurt n feel lyk hw i felt.
its nv bin easy to b tis wae.
n e v e r
bt i learnt to b more stronger
evry single dae.
n nw, im proud enuf to sae tt
m strong nw.
:)

wen u do bad tings to sumone,
ul b returned w it one dae.
im nt swearing.
its js retribution or karma.
wt goes arnd cums arnd.
n wen tt hapens..
one wil den realise his/her
own mistakes.

to din..
im sorie for nt pickin up ur calls.
n sorie for nt bein dere wen ur in need..
my credit was damn2 low.
im sure we'll b meetin up sn.
so, share it w me later oryt?
for nw, js b hapi n dun dwell on it.
take it as a leson n learn fr it..
love is nt sth tt u cn simply say i love u.
il tok to u sn ok?
take care fo nw..

to honeyy..
life has nv bin hapier without
u around..
i treasure n cherish those moments
wen im w u..
ur e first one i wana c wen im awake
n ur e las one i wana c before i close
my eyes to slip..
i alwys pray for ur safety each dae.
i love eu soo much more den
words cud eva say..
im sorie for wt hapened.
i nv eva wanted it tt wae b..
im sorie once again..
imisheu

.. treasure wt u hv before u lose it ..

2008-05-09T16:13:00.002+08:00

i went blog-hopin js nw.
n tok sumtym to chat w old frens.
one has just passed his class 2B tp.
one js broke up w her 3yrs bf..
one is servin his 5yrs bond w police.
soo much to b typed..
haha.

wel, tym pass so quickly..
its oreadi may nw..
n its goin to half a yr..
n den its 2009!
tym js wont stop for anyone.
tym is js too precious to be wasted.

n ya, i shud b havin my 2B tp very sn.
if i din waste any tym, i shud b ridin nw.
stoopid me!
bt at least, i make it..
wuhoo!
cant wait for it al.
i wana b a rider lyk anyone else!
if other gals cn make it til clas 2,
y cant i?
bt i dun tink il b takin it til clas 2..
wel, its s simple s tis.
i wont b able to ride the big bike
due to my height.
haha.

ive bin atendin skool regularly
aft al those calls fr clas advisors
and section head and endles-naggings
fr mama.
finally, im doin great!
haha.

no more werkin for me..
my love din allow me to.
so, i spen most tym in skool,
lepakin n goin out n stay at home
wen he's werkin..

thnk god tings hv bin doin great
for the both of us.
hopefuly no more nonsense anymore..
trust is nt to be gained easily.
bt trust is easily betrayed.
reali hope to c tis relationshp
werking n go further..

im kinda mish my baby hilmy ryt nw..
wen wil he b comin bck?
its oreadi 2wks..
he shud b comin bck sn..
hopefuly hes doin fine..
n i do hope wen he comes bck later,
he wil hv a new tooth!
mish goin out w him.
sobsob.

babydarlin has been werkin real hard..
to werk in a place, near to my home
was sth t i cud nv imagine.
i mean, its great to hv him nearer to me..
at least i wont hv to worry so much.
n its bin sumtyms since we las fought.
hopefuly hes werkg on his stopid bad habit!
im sure he noes wt isit..

to honeyy,
thnks for showerin me w al
ur love n care..
i wudnt noe wt i wud b without u arnd..
thnks for alwys bein dere for me wheneva
im in need.
im sory for al those tings tt hurt u in e pas..
do hope our relationshp goes stronger n
further each single dae..

inlovesyan

2008-02-29T21:16:00.002+08:00

i have nt been fillin wel tis fw daes..
went to take medicine n stil on
medication til lyk nxt wk i gez..
doc said ive gt throat effection.
wTh??
wt did i do mann?
myb too much smokin n too much..
dunoe. haha!
my body has been filin weak n ive
bin restin too much a home tt nw
im getting home sick!
ugHh!

tooday honeyy is bz werkin so i
wont b able to meet him up..
suposedly cn, bt i dun wana
disturb his time to res later on
cos he'll b startin werk early tmrw..
wel, to have a wife who is spendthrift lyk
me, he has to work hard.. ryt baby?

niwae, thnks honeyy for all tt uve done for me..
i do apreciate it al without u realisin it..
u alwys pick me up wen i fal n u'll b
dere weneva im in need..
n i love bein pampered by u!
wuhoOo!!
reli2 love eu baby..
niwae, im mishin eu lyk crazy nw..

okok,
im havin a damn weak dae todae..
sumone pls ask me out pls..
bt at e same tym, im too weak to go out..
haish.
il js stay at home lar n wait for honeyy
to end werk n call me up..

niwae, do anyone noe wen e
final debarment list gona be put up?
ya, i got debarred. thnks to my laziness!
haish..
ive appealed n nw stil waitin for it al..
if i reli gt debarred, i gez it wil be slightly later
for me to get maried..
ryt honeyy? haha.

kk, its too early to slip nw
n its too tiring to continue resting since ive
bin resting lyk e whole dae.
wt shud i do ehk??
any ideas?

to serine,
im sorie for bein too frank to u
in msn js nw.. i mean, u asked me wts
ur attiude tt pple dislike or sth lyk tt ryt?
im reli sorie ya to be frank..
haha. no harm filings k?
niwae, let go of ur past n move on!
let go of it al..
bcos of u holdin on to it,
u stress urself!!
y shud u?
i dun tink tts a gd wae..
ul b havin exams sn..
so y dun u js concentrate on ur exams?
ok ok..
wtv it is, rmbr we are alwys behind to
suport u.. n we wil b dere wheneva ur in need.
love ya babe~

lovethewayheis

2008-02-16T15:20:00.003+08:00

Happi Valentines' Day!

haha.
i noe its kinda late nw..
bt its ok..
haha.
wel, my V day was great!
wuhoo!
he fetched me aft skool
w new baby wave..
n den we went seoul garden
to fil our empty stomache.
haha!
we were soo ful by the first hr..
he stil went to search sum more
food n gez wt he bring me?
haha. a bowl of ice kachang..
"happi valentines' dae!" he wished..
i smiled.. haha!
e ice kachang cn kill u!
u gona die of diabetes!
hhahaha..
stoopid honeyy..
we were ful by den tt
we slowly ate it al..
denn sudennly he asked me to
go over n check if deres
any new items..
wel, i went..
n dunoe wt to pick,
i made sth stoopid tt i
smiled n laughed away alone..
i decorated a smal bowl w a
stoopid smiley!
haha.
i cant stop laughin..
honeyy was lyk smilin away wen
i brought it to him..
n den afew mins later,
he wanted to go toilet!
n ya, im left alone, cant stop smilin
n cant stop laughin alone..
pple were lookg bt who cares..
hahahaha..
check thos pics in my multiply!
it was quite sumtym tt he returned..
he brought a red rose~
im loving it!
im soo damn touched tt i nearly
shed tears..
wel, thnks baby!!
n denn we shoppin..
n finaly to our pit stop..
haha!
it was damn superb n greatt~

v dae wasnt tt bad aft al..
ryt honeyy?
i love euu~

n i love ur haircut!
wuhoo..

chek out my multiply for pics..

2008-02-05T00:03:00.000+08:00

let e pas b e pas..

im takin it slowly..

i noe e truth.

every single ting of it..

n wel, truth alwys hurts..

bt im tryin my bes to take it al in..

n ya, im willin to forgive tt sumone.

wel, no pt tokin abt it al.

it has oreadi hapened.

i wudnt wan to tok abt it nimor..

hopefuly tings wil b fine btwn us.

honeyy, i love eu!!

n im mishin eu lyk crazy nw..

biler nk tunang? :)

2008-01-21T15:55:00.000+08:00

its my blog n its my say..
u hate it?
js leave ok?

ok.
tings hv bin wel..
im hapi s i m..
esp w him arnd..
tings hv bin great for us..
no mor tears..
no more fears..
bt stil, ...
'pple' js cant stop leavin him alone.
haish.
bt thnk god, he tels me everytg
js to avoid misunderstnding or wtsoeva.

ok, we r werkin hard nw for $500.
for sth special for him.
nt everyone noes abt it..
so, js wait n c ok?
haha.
we love each other~

..im hapi s i m..

2008-01-21T15:53:00.000+08:00

ouhh reali??

ic..

ouhk.

2008-01-15T17:46:00.000+08:00

would u ...

pretend as if nothing happen
and be happy

OR

would u ...

wan to c e truth ryt in ur eyes
n get disapointed n hurt badly

2008-01-09T03:35:00.000+08:00

first of all,
HapPy New YeaR pple!
i noe its oreadi a week..
im reli2 sorie..
was bz werkin n enjoyin tt
ive totali gt no tym to blog..
reli2 sorie abt tt peeps..

kk, its nearly 4am nw..
bt i dunoe y im sitin outside,
w e laptop on my lap n cigrate
on my hand n started to blog..
jus havin a hard tym sleepin todae..
was playin psp n den played games
on my hp n stil, i din fil sleepy..
so decided to on my laptop, n started
surfin n finaly to blog..
ya, its bin a damn loong tym since i las blog..

lets get started ok.

2007 was a year ful of ups n dwns.
wel, tt seems lyk a standard line..
dun u guys tink so?
stoopid me!
wel, 2007 was kinda shitty.
w one of our closest fren decided nt to
tok to ALL of us, dunoe to wt reasons.
even if he were to break up w her,
tt doesnt ean he cn js ignore us n treat
us lyk bulshit ryt?
wel, its reli a damn big issue for me..
cos i noe tt i din do anytg wrong bt instead
ive gt tt kinda treatment. wth?
i dun get him bt WHO E HELL CARES?

erm.. since a new yr, i beta nt sae abt e past.
im js hopin tt 2008 wil b a beta yet sucesful year for me..
js wan e best out of e best.
life has been gd soo far.
bt im sure it cn b beta..

ok,
new skool semester has js started.
i dun fil lyk skoolin anymor seyy!
bt i noe, ive got to no mater wat.
n i dunoe wt e hel is wrong w me..
kip nt wantin to go to skool.
myb its jus lazines.
dere shudnt b any other xcuse.

abt my bike pracs,
gez wad??
ive took e rtt for 3tyms..
n i finally got it ryt at las..
haha. bt nw, im stucked.
cos ive nt bin goin for pracs
for nearly 3mths i gez..
haiyoo!
i reli need to back up n quickly pas
n get a bike license mann!
soo damn slow siaa!
aft tt, i cnt strt enrolin for car license..
wuhooo!

one mor ting..
it has alwys bin playin wildly in mind..
i dunoe.
bt im too scared myself.
shud i sae it out?
myb i shud.
afw frens arnd me who are atched
actuali went out w sum other pple w/o
their patners' knowledge..
n ive gt damn scared myself..
i mean, they r lyk playin behind their
partners' back..
n i reli dun wan tt to hapen to me..
sooo damn scared!
hopefuly nth of tt sort gona hapen to us..
i dun wish to.

ok,
tings btwn me n him has been doin great lately..
hv bin spendin too much tym togeta..
n im simply lovin it..
hopefuly love wil last cos i c e future in him..
if nt, i tink il nt cry bt il surely die.
hmph!
crapin nw.
bt reli, i do love him damn lots!
more den words cud eva sae..
even he wont noe hw much is tt lots.
wel, onli god knows..

oklar..
i tink tt shud b al..
wudnt wan to drag any longer..
js wana hv a piece of mind nw n get sum res.
gd nytz pple~

2007-11-23T17:32:00.000+08:00

im back. aft for sooo long of mia.
ryt?? k, im sorie pple..
ive been too bz lately.. tt ive totali
gt no tym for anytin else.. ouhh god!!
til hw long wil tt b?
kinda frustrated at tyms, kinda iritated.
wtf?!
bin bz werkin.. n getin tired of tt too..
nth else to say except,
"hi welcome to mcdelivery. susila speakin....."
ughh!! tiredd mann!! damn tiredd..
ya, pple say y shud it b soo tirin
wen al i hv to do is sit n ans kols..
n yar, dun u tink tokin isnt tiring??
hhaa! wel, werkin for newly two months, ive oreadi
bin sick for few tyms. once, i got soretroat..
n worst sti, i gotta werk n ans kols..
ugHh!!

kk, enuf of tt.

honey n i hv bin gd lately.. wel, sth
actuali hapened btwn us
fw wks bck bt i dun tink
dere's a need for me to blog it here..
s we both cn setle i among ourselves n
we dun need others
to setle those probs for us.
we r big enuf to tink..
wel, once again, im reli2 sorie..
due to my tight schedule btwn skool n werk,
ive gt no tym for him.. n den tings
started to change a litle..
bt thnk god, its him who pul us bck togeta
n tings r goin great nowadaes..

thnks b!!
ur my world, ur my everythin..

he's nv been gd tis wae..
he buys me wteva tings i wan..
(bt of cos money cant buy love)
he gives me everytin tt i wan..
he's dere wheneva im in need..
n he wil nv get sick of meetin me up evrydae!

too much to be said now..
i js wana sae tis to him..

baby,
i wil nv2 get enuf of eu..
im soo thnkful tt we pulled tru
n thnks to u for savin tis relationshp
before anytin else hapens..
im reli sorie oryt..
ive learnt my mistakes n i wont
eva wanaa repeat it again..
i love eu soo much to even let u go..
love n mish eu lyk alwys..

kk,
i gtg pple..
gota go out n mit him sn..
wuhOoo!!

2007-11-08T18:49:00.000+08:00

HA P PY
O N E
Y EA R
AN NI VER SA RRY
B A B Y!

L O V E
i s
ALL
about
YaN and iN

inlovesyan
07 11 2006

2007-10-31T04:26:00.000+08:00

i cudnt close my eyes to slip..
tinkin of u is al i cud do ryt nw..
i dunoe y im feelin tis wae..
im js mishin eu badly honeyy..
i kip tryin to kol u,
i wanted to hear ur voice badly..
bt al i cud hear was e beepin
sound of a bz num..
ive bin tryin my bes to slip
bt i js cudnt turn myself in..
im mishin eu too badly..
ull alwys dere weneva im in need..

wen it was stil alive, ul alwys b dere
sms-in me n miskolin me weneva i din reply..
it was den slowly driftin away,
bt im glad tt i cud stil sms u cos i noe
ul b readin it.. n i cud kol u at anytym weneva
i wana hear ur sweet voice..
bt nw tt its dead, i cudnt even hear u sae
u mish me too..
i cudnt even sms u to tel u hw much i mish eu
n hw much im dyin for ur huggies-dry-pampers..

wen wil e line b alive again??
hw i wish i cud help u pay ur outstandin bil..
:)

i truli mish eu baby..
both of us hv bin werkg badly..
s if we r getin maried nxt mth..
haha!
we hv bin spendin lesser tym w each other..
bt thnk god, we both understn each other alot..
nw tt we r livin "quite far apart",
im sure we both apreciate each other mor nw..
i nvr forget to pray everynyt before closin my eyes to slip..
i pray for our long-lastin relationship..
n for ur safety on e road..
i wudnt wan to lose eu one dae honeyy..
im sure u wont..
truli mish eu..

i gez il js force myself to slip nw..
mishin eu too badly tt i was
actuali shedg tears js nw w/o realisin it..
im sorie.. i noe u hate it alot wen i shed tears..
i dunoe y.. it js rolled dwn.. :P
ok ok..
il js force myself to slip nw..
cos il b goin over to ur place s early s 7am
to bring u a surprise mac breakfast..
haha!!
hw sweet m i??
haha..

okok..
gdnytz..

Missing you
loving you
like
I do
I drive myself crazy
without you...
..mish eu baby..

2007-10-29T02:29:00.000+08:00

its 230am nw..
i was aslip js nw..
den woke up ate sum noodle n fil
lyk goin onto e net to chek my werk schedule..
n of cos, to blog too..
im sorie peeps..
reli2 sorie if ive nt bin updatin lately..
ive bin too bz skoolin, bz werkin,
bz spendg tym w him n bz doin hari raya visits..
phew!!

kk..
i update a lil bit mor abt myself n lyk ok??
ive bin bz skoolin..
n ive started werkg since las week..
my werk got no off dae at al unles i make it
my own off dae, which so far ive done onli once..
cant take it..
e reason was cos ive bin rushg fr skool to werk n
den fr werk bck home, js hv a few hrs res n hv to
wake early in e mornin to go bck to skool.
n it continues e same ting each dae..
hw pathetic is tt??
as if no lyf ryt??
n yar, w tt bz schedule of mine,
i got to meet honeyy abit lesser
den i alwys do..
n thnk god, he understn me lots..
bt of cos, my sat n sun is especialy for him!
wuhooo!!
haha..

kk, cn i tel a story abt fri??
haha!!i want to!

suposed to go to skool on fri morning..
bt both me n nadia overshot!
haha! n at e same tym nadirah cant
atend skool cos she got btt, n hana too cant
make it to skool cos she got to werk..
den later tt aftnun, i was supsed to werk..
bt my body was too damn weak..
i wasnt feelin wel..
kept sneezin, havin runin nose,
cnt stop coughin.. it al started on wed..
i knew i gona fall sick.. cos its bin a loong tym
since i las werk.. wen i got tis packed schedule,
i defintely noe, tings wil go wrong..
so i decided nt to go to werk, claimin i got mc..
i din go to clinic of cos..
bt at least i took panadol n hv ample res..
suposedly to go n acompany honey tt dae
to wash his bike bt i slept til 10plus at nyt..
haha!! aft tt, rushed dwn to simei to meet
baby, sheikh n razif.. cos we wil b goin to
nad's fren' chalet..
i tot upon my arrival, they wil b done
w washing bt nono..
i got to wait again.. i tink abt an hr..
haish.
den we proceed to costa sands..
e chalet was of cos wont b soo similar lyk us..
ryt peeps??
haha!!
my chalet was stil e bes!!
wuhoo!!
kk, nad's fren's chalet was actualy kinda bored..
bt thnks to me, baby, sheikh n razif for makg it fun!
nonsense!! haha.. we(even dem) cnt stop laughg w
al our stoopid lame jokes n dun forget e stoopid poem!
haha.. ive bin disturbed damn bad on tt nyt, bt thnk
god its dem who disturbed me.. or else, u noe i noe..
haha!! went bck quite late.. tink we reached home
abt 5plus.. i decided to slip n hv a res bt tinkin again,
i cant cos im werkg at 8am on tt dae..
so i started playin psp..
ughhH! had a bath n den of to werk..
damn early wen i reached werkplace
bt nvm.. aft werk, went bck home..
n otw bck i slept in e bus n i missed quite a num
of bustopss.. stoopid me! den upon reachg home,
called honeyy up cos we r suposed t go out jln raya
w his bike members.. n ya, i din sleep ok!
ughHh! so e dae continue.. goin hari raya visits
n den at 8 plus we hd to go to KTM.. its sumwhere near
vivo city, e place where pple go dere to eat at nyt..
stufs lyk tt lar.. we had 6tables joined togeta i gez..
alot of us mann!! al in hari raya costume..
honeyy hv meetin w other teams dere..
my eyes r damn red n i js cant take it animor..
gez wt i do next??
hhahaha!
yeahh, sleep..
i put my handbag one table, n few secs later..
zZzzzZZz..
hahah!! cant take it seyy..
aft an hr i gez, i woke up.. haha!
den arnd 12plus midnyt, we went to kent ridge park..
n honeyy's team continue ther meetin dere..
n shit!! i seriusli cnt take it.. haha..
finaly, home sweet home arnd 2plus in e mornin..

suposed to werk at 8am..
bt den, i js cudnt wake up..
haha!!
sorie..
im too damn tired..
honeyy ended up callin me alot
of tyms js to wake me up cos we r suposed
to continue hari raya visits again..
haish. woke up quite late..
quickly ironed my baju kebaya n den of
to hv my shower n went out..
second place was stil e best..
ryt b??
my fren's boss' house..
its damn coolshit!!
he made a part of his into a bar..
sum sort lyk a bar.. we karaoked..
we sang.. we ate.. we drank.. (i mean F&N)
haha!! its damn coolshit..
damn rich i gez.. haha!
forget it.

fuhhh!! damnn long story ryt??
n its only
2daes story..
if i were to tel u guys abt e pas fw wks..
i gez u guys wudnt wan to read my blog
ever again.. haha!!
kk..

finaly,
for u honeyy..
thnk god, our relationship hs bin great lately..
u do undtsn me lots honeyy tho ive bin bz skoolin
n werkg at e same tym.. we both hv bin patient..
patience is a need in al relationships..
thnk god, we hv nt bin arguin lately..
do love eu lots baby.. niwae, before i forget,
im sorie to wake up in e middle js to blog tis..
haha! reli sorie tau.. u wanted me to hv an early
nyt bt instead ... sorie sayang!
niwae, i wud lyk to sae
i mish n love eu baby!! muackz2!!

kk..
i beta stop it nw..
its soo fcukg damn loong..
haha!!
kk,
gd nytz pple..
wil update weneva im free ok??

love y'all

2007-10-15T23:13:00.000+08:00

kinda boredd now..
so decided to blog again..
ugHh!!

thnk god, tmrw is holidae!!
haha..
ITE is havin tis special skool
holidae cos ITE js received an
award or awards.. sth lyk tt..
im nt soo sure..
haha!!

im soo boredd nw..
havin bin lyin n lazing arnd
since js now..
suposedly we hav to go out
to go to my aunt's place for hari raya
visit but al seems to b lazy..
so e plan for todae is cancelled..

tis year raya to me is kinda packed..
soo damn packed w visitings..
ive been reserved by my sec skool frens,
clasmates, ritz gang, lepak kakis,
baby's team.. pheww!!
lotss mann!!
soo tite..
hopefuly tings go on wel..

ok..
im havin a smal prob here..
isit posible for u guys to actuali
tag me n tel me wts ur opinion..
haha!!
wt if i say, il b engaged aft ite daes,
just before he enter ns??
isit posible?
please tel me..
haha!
( sorie sayang!! :) )

baby..
im mishin eu badly..
damn bad honeyy..
thnk god tings hv bin great for
e both of us..
n we hv bin too bz these daes w fam
tt we actuali spen leser tym togeta..
bt im sure we wil b spendin mor tym sn..
ryt honeyy??
we'll have sum mor fun oryt?? :P
aper ckp?? haha..
kk..
i truli mish euu!!!
gez ur bz entertainin ur relatives nw..
tts y u din reply..
il b waitin oryt??
tmrw is holidae!!
so, u noe i noe..
haha!!
hopefuly we'll b able to meet up..
if nt, den its ok..
niwae, da tnyer mama u blm??
haha!!
u tau kn aper..
:)
blg mama, lau kt uma nyer kueh
sumer buat perhiasan, den nanti
i g sane bwk kueh sendiri lar..
lgpn mama u suro kn kn?
haha!!!
biler nk dtg uma i?
"utk mintak maaf.. u kn byk dose.."
haha..
sal senyum2??
kk..
im crapin nw..
haha!
im mishin eu b!!

ok pple..
gez aft tis i wana play
my beloved pink psp!!
its been soo long since i las
play it.. ugHh!!

okok..
gd nytz my dear frens..

2007-10-15T19:31:00.000+08:00

ugHHh!!!
wtf?!
deres tis crazy gal who
actuali made stories up
to break two lovebirds apart..
wtF?!
i tink shes out of control!!
kinda mad!
at e same tym, i fil soo damn down..
i do trust honeyy..
i dun tink he wil b doin tt to me..
i noe he wont..
let tt crzy gal b..
too damn sick of al tis..
wt goes around cums around..
crazy shitt!!
tis is her email add:
hotstufss@hotmail.com
her name is farisha!!
c, if u guys noe tis idiot..
shes here to break hapi
rlthshp up.. probbly she gt no life..
ugHhh!!
fcuKk it lar..
i dun gv a damnn..

i do trust u b..
nt to wori ok sayang??
i swear i trust u..
i love eu soo much honeyy..
im sorie if im bein too unreasonable
js nw.. i was js too shocked...
i dunoe hw to react..
haish.
howeva, i do trust u..
i noe tings wil nt b tt wae..
i noe tt too wel..
truli love eu!!
im sorie once again..

ok ok ..
let me take tis tym to blog abt e pas
few daes too..
ive bin too bz tt ive gt no tym to
blog at al..
ughh!!
wel, hari raya preparation was damn
t i r i n g . .
bt overal, it paid of..
new outfit, new curtain, new shoes..
:)
all new..
n most importantly, celebratin
hari raya tis yr w my only love,
muhammad hafiz!!
aft 2 or 3yrs of nt celebratg it togeta s a
couple, finaly i managed..
haha!!
its cool shit!
we gt pink, black, white, green, blue
outfits.. wuhoo!!
lyk weddin reception.. haha!
which one to wear??
haha!!
too excited nw..
haiyo!!

kk..
js nw was first dae of skool..
i went to cdc for rtt n den of to meet
my galfrens.. n den we of to skool..
n gez wad??
we were caught in e heavy rain!
ugHhh!!
al were wet of cos..
n we were late!
bt who cares??
we atended skool for onli an hour
n den GHN!
tts wt e new teacher says..
gez wad it is??
GO HOME NOW..
haha!!
nonsense..
k, i got entrprenuershp
for my elective..
dere wont b any exam for tt
module.. hopefuly its gona b wel..

i start crapin oreadi..
soo damn tiredd now..
more tired w e shit tt hapen js nw..
haish.

howver,
i do love n trust u b..
dun wori ok??
love n mish eu badly sayang!!
take care..

n to al,
S E LA MA T
H A R I
RA YA
M A A F
ZA H IR
DAN
BA T IN!!

2007-10-05T16:37:00.000+08:00

kinda tiredd now..
woke up early todae to go
for my bike practicals..
n yeahh!!
haha!
goin for my revision tonyt again!
shit hapens..
i dun wana go!
bt stoopid fingers of mine accidentali
clicked on it..
haish..
n im forced to as nt wantin to
waste money..
haish..
left w no option..

kk..
forget abt tt..

erm..
lyf has bin great so far..
ive bin enjoyin myself
too much i gez..

it started on wed..
went "datin" w honeyy..
its bin quite a loong tym
since we las went out togeta..
n i mean jus e both of us..
finally we did..
thnks to him for endin
werk early js for me..
fr simei to bugis to plaza sing
n den to...
hahaha!
n
then
thurs, which is ystd,
we went lepak-ing..
hha!!
n yar, its been a loong tym too..
frens hv bin bz w stufs..
we hv bin bz too..
haha!
honneyy is suposed to werk..
bt den, he tol his IC tt his
nt filin wel bt den he din
receive any respond..
so he went..
bt too bad, upon reachg dere..
he can go bck cos dey gt a
replacement..
haha!!
stoopid him!
n so, he wanted to meet me up..
so, my meetin w a fren earlier on
gt canceled..
so went to cdc to topup my acc..
haha!
alighted at e wrong bustop..
honeyy den saw n horn me..
wel, i was kinda stoopid n ashamed..
haha!!
kk..
den went break fastin under
dunnoe-whos-blok..
haha!
den went ikea n giant
w three monkeys..
honeyy, razif n wan!
its alwys a
non-stop-laughin-hits
w dem..
haiyo!
den went lepakkin at tampines mart
til 4am!
ijah was dere too!
den of bck home..

ouhh godd!
i tink im gettin too long winded..
m i??
i tink so..
stoopid me!!

erm k, i js got to noe my results!
it wud hv been beta grades if i hv studied
hard n atend lessons regularly..
however, i pas..
gez il try harder..
i gotta buck up n atend skool DAILY.

k.
gt to end nw i gez..
wana res den watch chinese shows
den break fas den res den go out to cdc
n den hv my revision n den no-idea..
if frens hv plans tonite, den il mit dem up.
if nt, goin bck strait.. furthermor,
honeyy is goin out w his besfren..

kk..
long winded again!

2007-10-02T20:56:00.000+08:00

i reli dun wana sae much..
im tryin my fcukin bes to change..
change for e beta, for e future..
but..
nvm, dere's no point sayin..
i reli dun expect much..
ive given u e freedom,
bt tt doesnt mean u need nt msg me ryt??
even if u dun wana msg me, wel at least
tel me tt u gona b bz online or watsoeva
so i dun hv to wait for ur reply or wtsoeva.
haish.
i dun wana make a big fcuk out of it..
im bein very patient..
bt dere's alwys a limit to everytg..
niwae, i promis i wont ask much..
i wont hurt u either..
let me js sufer on my own,
even if im dyin n cryin inside..
at e veri least i dun hurt u..
im bein at my bes to undstn u..
undstn every single ting tt u wan..

haish.
haish.
haish.

im js ur gal..
ive totali gt no ryt at al
to control r to sae anitin..
totali no ryts..
im stil bein very2 patient..
im tryin my best nt to argue animor..
(bt i noe tts imposible)
e bes wae is js to keep silent..
im js too afraid tt my action or words
gona hurt or make tings worst or wtsoeva..
tts e reason y im bein kinda quiet nw..
keepoin every single ting to myself..
its ok if ive gt to sufer alone..

too much tings hv hapen tis fastin mth..
i dunoe y..
probably its js to test us..
bt its kinda..
i dunoe.
forget it..

went for interview js nw..
went alone..
cos frens were al bz w bfs..
while my bf is restin..
so, decided to go alone..
haish.
den went threadin w serine at tekka mal..
aft tt we walked to bugis n fr dere
we went our separate way bck home..
wanted to meet him up bt since he said
he wana res n stufs, den il js go bck..
wel, its bin 2daes ok.
forget it.
before my tears roll down
(it seems to roll dwn any tym)..
wel, im ok..
seriusli im ok..

ive gt tis confesion to make..

im js ur gal..
ive gt no ryt to control..
n ive gt no ryt to sae anitin.
BUT its kinda hard to acept
if one dae my guy is goin out w
other gals (onli e both of dem)..
okok.
love is suposedly to b beautiful..
love is actuali a white piece of paper,
covered w beautiful n colourful roses
tt represent e gd n beautiful tings
n nt forgetin e thorns which actuali represent
e rocky surface n bad tings..
bt at tyms, love hurts!
baby, i seriusli wont control u..
tts y weneva u said "no", i alwys
try to undtsn.. i wont get angry or shout at u..
in fct, i keep mum n deep inside onli god knows.
s long s i dun show it in front of my loved ones,
it shudnt b any problem hopefuly..
niwae, i mish eu too.. :'(

lifeislife

2007-09-27T18:41:00.000+08:00

its tym i blog abt tt dae..
i was surfin e net..
my hp wasnt in use..
so i din get to sms or kol him..
bt e nyt before, i did kol him..
n w him promisin me sum stufs,
ive gt a LIL beta..
i alwys check on him for
e moment tt we were
havin a tiff..
s i was checkin on him n
knowin tt he was at e carpark
goin out probably,
im getin lost..
im too scared..
n in js a few minutes,
i received an email fr him..
i was online bt i blocked him
cos i dun wan to end up tokin to
him since we agreed to b left alone
fr few daes..
i opened up e email..
"cntct me asap"
tts e 3werds tt he sent..
upon readin it, i unblock him
n we started chatin..
he js cudnt take it n he tot of
meetin me up!
n ya, tings were fine den..

we met up n spen a long2 nyt
w each other..
tings were great..
hopefuly e pas wil teach us
certain tings in lyf..
ive learnt my mistakes..
nobody is perfect aniwae..
aft enjoyin ourselves tt nyt,
i stil din go bck.. instead, went
over to his place..
gez wt??
i had to paint his room!
it was damn tiring..
bt i dun mind, s long s he's
dere nxt to me..
js bein dere nxt to me is enuf..
(actuali its nt enuf bt its sth lar..)
we managed to paint e whole room
abt 3hrs or less..
his mom wanted me to break fast dere
bt i dun fil lyk it..
dunoe y..
so she passed me a tuperware
of fried noodles!
wuhoo!
mama cooked chicken rice tt dae!
i ate soo much..
aft tt, zzzz~
haha!!

ok ok.. enuf of tt dae..
i reli enjoyed myself w him..
n cos of tt nyt, we cant ...
(beta nt to say it.. ryt b?)
haha!
okok.

its been rainin heavily todae..
haish..
ive nt bin filin wel..
cudnt slip ystd..
had runin nose, a slight fever
n i cant stop coughin!
ughH!
he's werkin now..
hopefuly he's oryt..
m mishin eu badly honeyy!
i wanted to jb w u tonyt..
bt i dunoe.
myb i shudnt.
c hw e plan goes..

niwae, i went readin sumone's
blog js nw.. it was js bein updated todae!
n i dunoe hw shud i go abt it..
shud i js sae it??
ok ok .
i gez e pas was abt me..
it was bein explained clearly..
niwae, if e bloger is readin tis,
i wud lyk to sae tt its e past..
n we shud learn fr our mistakes..
we hv our own mistakes..
i cant b blamin everytg on u..
ryt?
now tt we have our own lyf to live,
we shud treasure al those gd tings n
apreaciate mor now.. nt til we lost tt
gd tings den we want to realise..
it wud b late den..
i undtsn wt u hav been facin al tis while..
js live lyf to e fulest n treasure ur loved ones..
i js fil lyk blogin tis cos u were once my fren.
take care.

baby,
im mishin eu badly!!
hopefuly u make a gd plan tis sat..
a date at swensens?
wuhooO!
i cant wait for tt..
hopefuly it turn out great for us..
waitin for u to end werk..
mish n love eu honeyy!
muackzz!!

2007-09-25T21:52:00.001+08:00

thank god!
everytin's fine nw..
i dun hv to wait til
tomorow's evenin..

"e dae is near yet so far"
e dae is finaly here..

im extremely hapi ryt nw,
at tis moment..

thanks honeyy..!!
i cant wait to meet u up n den
we go n have sum fun!
lets start afresh..
i wudnt wan to b apart
from u animor..

i swear,
I N E E D U!
c u sn baby!!

my lyf is shone w lite again

2007-09-25T17:10:00.000+08:00

im seriusli fine pple..
no wories ok??
tym wil eventuali heal..
tings alwys hapen for a reason..
wel, i js gota b mor patient..

ive nt bin feelin wel..
ouh godd!!
im sorie body..
im sorie for torturin u..
i noe i shudnt do tis..
bt i cant help it..
ive nt bin havin enuf res..
ive nt bin havin enuf consumption
for my energy boost.. (wtf?!)
ive nt bin havin enuf of him too!
ive bin wastin too much tears..
ive bin wastin too much energy..

ok.
i hate todae..
i dunoe y..
bt hw i wish i wudnt have to
wake up todae..
i js wana wake up on wed evenin..
can i??
please.
i dun need todae..
i NEED tomorow..

dere's alwys a reason for al
those tings tt hapen in life..
either good or bad..

honeyy,
i truli mish eu badly..
i reli do..
n i noe ur mishin me s much
s i do.. ryt??
i dun blame u for al tis tings..
i undstn y u r doin tis..
n thnk god, u promised me those
tings js before i go to bed ystd..
or else, every nyt i slip w fear..
hopefuly, tings wil go on wel for us..
take care sayang..
c u soon!

to frens out dere,
im sorie..
reli2 sorie..
i noe i alwys make u guys
wori abt me..
i shudnt hv done tt..
its js me..
im sorie if ive bin too
keep-everytin-to-myself..
i dun mean it..
no wories oryt??
il b fine for sure..
n i do apreciate al thos concern..
thnks peepss!

im ok!
no wories..

2007-09-24T16:27:00.000+08:00

its tym..

its tym for me to b alone..

anyone wana acompany me

to sumwhere where i can cry

my hart out??

i js need tt sumone to sit beside me..

tts al..

js sit beside me while i cry..

can sumone pls??

ughh!

im soo lost ryt nw..

im goin out soon..

to sumwhere where i used to go..

il js spen my dae dere..

wen im tiredd, il go bck..

il b fine..

no wories..

im goin out..

if u guys cant get tru me,

im soo sorie..

2007-09-24T00:54:00.000+08:00

i

mishh

eu

b!

tsk.. tsk..

2007-09-24T00:11:00.000+08:00

YESS!!

I
AM
BEIN
TOO

D A M N

S E L F-
C E N T R E D

2007-09-23T20:40:00.000+08:00

ok.
kinda bored todae..
i cant meet honeyy..
tot of goin out w fam bt
al of dem werent at home
wen i woke up..
woke up quite late todae..

kinda lonely now..
mama din reply my sms..
i break fas alone js nw..
haish.

i watched a few episodes of
hikmah js den i stop to break fas..
aft tt, i went karaoke-ing alone..
haha!
crazy...
i sang my hart out..
who e hel cares ryt?
haha!
nw blogin..
aft tis gona watch hikmah again..
wuhoo!!

ok ok..
i wana bath first..
i havent had any since i wake up..
:P

to baby,
im mishin eu badly..
real bad..
bt i do undstn..
cant wait to meet u up sn..
wuhoo!!

to peeps out dere,
ive uploaded sum pics
into my multiply..
take a look oryt??
thnkss..

inlovesyan.multiply.com

2007-09-22T16:45:00.000+08:00

thank god..
everytin is fine n normal now..
e pas wil b e pas..

its 4.45pm nw..
wen wil honeyy gona wake up??
ive bin waitin since js nw..
ive bin wakin him up..
bt he stil is slipin soundly nw..

BABY!! WAKE UP!!

no point shoutin in here..
cos he wont b hearin it..
stoopid me!
haha!

ok ok..
im uploadin photos in multiply nw..
n aft tt i wana watch hikmah!
haha!!
thnks serine!!

wuhoo!!

2007-09-20T20:05:00.000+08:00

its amazing hw
L O V E
can actuali make
W O N D E R S..

wel, i tried to pt my atention
away fr him..
i js tot of bein al alone..

so i diverted al my kols.
so no one wud b able to
get tru me..
so be it.
lyk wt ive tot, i wana b alone.
aft dvertin al my kols,
i pt it on silent mode n place
it upside dwn (so e screen is facin dwn)
bt every sec n every min,
i checked on it..

ughh!
can i stop doin so??
ouhh please.

so obsessed w love.

niwae, ive bin strucked w
emotionally-behave
todae..
erm.. its js a word tt ive made todae.
actuali, ive bin cryin e whole dae todae..
i dunoe y.
firstly, ive argued w him.
n s per normal, shedin tears
is al tt i can do..
den todae's tv shows were al soo
hart-capturin! (WTF?!)

firstly i watched a repeated telecast
of tis malay series at 4pm..
it was reali sad..
i did cried..
n i totali cant stop cryin..
aft tt argued w honeyy..
n obviously, i cant stop
shedin tears..
later on, i watched tis chinese show
which plays every mon to fri at 7pm..
n i started cryin too..
wel, todae episode was kinda touchin..

ughh!!
its my dae todae..
kinda tired of cryin now..
tot of watchin tis VCD which is called
Love is Cinta..
bt im too afraid tt i started cryin again..
too emotionally afected ryt nw..
:'(

ive bin lookin at my hp fr js nw..
he sms-ed me onli once js nw,
sayin "Slamat berbuke"
n tts al.
haish.
its ok..
i wont kol nor sms him todae..
gez il js let everytin setle on its own..
i gez shit hapens al cos we hv bin spendin
to much tym togeta..
bt even if we dun spen tym togeta, we argue..
i dun undstn tt.
its ok..
il b werkg tomorow..
hopefuly, tings go bck to normal..

wel, shit hapens..
bt stil, im mishin him lyk
C R A Z Y
now..
he supposed to meet me tonyt
aft goin out w his dad..
bt i gez e plan wil for sure b canceled..
its al my fault..
im sorie..
ive bin too selfish..

im sorie..
im sorie..
im sorie..

cant stop tinkin of u

2007-09-20T18:15:00.000+08:00

haish.
wats w life?
or shud i sae wats w me?
haish.
shit
shit
n
shit
hapens.
soo much tings hv hapened
durin tis fastin mth.
ugHh!!
y isit tis wae??
kinda fcuked up!
ughh!
ok.
i noe.
its my fault
AGAIN.
haish.

we've bin arguin for
3consequtve daes.
wts wrong??
its fastin mth seyy..
haish.
i noe im havin my fcukg mensus
n u r fastin..
but.
ugHh!
no more say..

wel, since u dun wana ans my kol.
ok fine.
i noe wt to do..
since my prepaid is left w 1cents.
il "deactivate" it by usin up tt 1cent..
so u wont b able to find me.
n i wont b able to receive any kols,
even msgs.
bt i noe, u wnt even care.
ugh!
im soo fcukin tired nw.
no pt sayin al tis.
no pt blogin n tel e whole world.

js wana b alone nw..
il bath n go out by myself.
k pple, if u guys cant get tru me
im reli sorie..
js need to b alone..

..bein selfish..

2007-09-16T13:37:00.000+08:00

its sundae..
tomorow is mon..
n its alwys mon blues!!
n its werkin dae for both
me n baby..
haish.
gota werk hard for our future
ryt honeeyy??
oryt2..

ystdae was soo called a
cock up dae..
haha!!
we went out ridin..
dere was a total of abt 20 bikes..
if im nt wrong..
we decided to go IBP..
bt instead, everyone went straight
(we r suposed to exit sumwhere lar)
n den we met up w ttis big lori
tt actuali went in e opp direction..
ouhh god!!
a few bikes nearly got run down by
tt stoopid man!
its js a split second decision..
thnk god nth hapen!
n abt a few minutes later..
two frens who actuali exit another
place called to inform tt they gt
to stay at tis particular place cos
dey saw an acident n hv called e police..
dey gota wait til police arive..
haha!!
its e stoopid lori!!
he bang into another lori..
sth lyk tt..
bt he arent injured!
wtf?!
haha..
den we met up w tis rude n
crazy taxi who actuali pointed
midle finger at us bck!
it was his fault yet he argued back!
hmph!!
kk, den we r suposed
to pasby yishun dam wen a
racer actuali got stucked w his bike..
it cant b started..
haha!!
stoopid..
who asked him to js speed of lyk tt?!
its his fault aniwae..
in e end, two other frens of him placed their
legs (one on his right e other on his left) n ride
slowly s dey balanced themselves s wel s
guidin e racer bck home..
hahaha!
n finaly, we r suposed to hv a gd nyt..
ryt baby?
bt sumone actuali spoilt it al..
haha!!

kk.. its gettin longer now..

honeyy,
wake up!!
we r goin out w our lovely frens
later.. n dun forget, u hv to sen me
to buy donuts!! ive bin remindin u
since ystdae! haha!!
so, beta nt forget it..

ok ok..
il blog weneva im free..
wil strt getin bz w werk again..
haish.

takin care pple..

2007-09-15T19:07:00.000+08:00

hello diary!!
haha..
ive bin very2 bz werkin lately..
ive got no tym to meet n lepak w him
n frens..
ive got no tym for my family..
ive got no tym for soo many tings..
i missin those moment soo badly..
wel, ive bin very2 bz..

im sorie peeps if i din reply to any
of urs cals or ur sms-es..
ive bin werkin mornin til late nyt
so called evrydae..
haish.
bt its reli great to go bck werkg dere,
ritz carlton banquet..
n dere's alot of new faces..
many of e old birds arent dere animor..
bt its ok, i dun reli need frens while werkg..
cos tings wudnt go straight aniwae..
nvm to those who dun undstn tt..
haha..

ive binn too tired these fw daes..
if my body has a mouth to tok...
i gez it wud hv oreadii screamm!
haha.. sorie body!
im sorie..
haha!
wtf?!
ok ok ..

hw tym flies..
now is oreadi e fastin month..
first two daes, i fast..
bt todae? NO!
hmphh!!
its abt 2hrs before break fast,
bt my mensus came!
wastedd seyy!!
kinda stoopid..
hmph!
bt nvm..
i miss listenin to those prayers
before e tym of breakin fas..
todae was e first dae i heard it
aft forr soo long..
ive bin werkg n breakin fas at werk..
n we dun listen to radio, yet we wait
for others to sae tt its tym..
haha!!

ok ok..
i wana eat now..
pple r breakin fas outside..
bt here i m, bloggin..
n surfin e net..
n searchin for donuts!
haha..

to my gang,
(u shud noe who u r)..
we r mitin tomorow at bugis at 4pm..
attendance is compulsory!
haha!!
we'll b breakin fas togeta oryt??
niwae, ive gt some posion stufs for u guyss..
hahahaha...
its donutss!!
wel, i havent buy dem..
bt i wil do so before meetin
u guys up tmrw..
hw sweet m i?
very sweet lyk donut!
haha..
im getin crappy nw..
ok ok..

to baby,
im misshin eu badly now!!
we've yet to go to date one dae..
u owe me one..
or i shud sae, i owe u one??
nono, u owe me..
haha..
missin u honeyy..
wil b meetin u up soon..
yippee!
n we'll be goin meetin n
den myb ridin tonite??
ok den..
n i owe u sth..
haha!!
u noe n i noe..
n nt for pple to noe..
haha!
(getin crappy again)

to peeps,
sorie frenss..
ive bin too bz..
haha!!
bz werkg to get married to him!
can can?
haha..
c u guys wen im free oryt??
takin care..

to pple put dere,
SLAMAT BERPUASE!

..love y'all..

2007-09-10T18:44:00.000+08:00

ok.
im back after for soo long..
haha!!
erm..
js wanted to keep tings to myself..
sum tings r js nt meant to b shared..
bt sum close frens noe abt it
n hopefuly, it wil js b kept in dem..
ok ok..
wtv hapens, hs oredi hapened..
so, e best wae is to live lyf a normal
n simple way..
ryt??
erm.. ya, shud b..
ok ok..
time will heal..
haish.
tinkin abt it at tyms do make me
shed tears..
nobody wil understn e feelin..
e feelin is sooo strong tt it cant b felt..
wtf?!
haha.
lets forget it la..

both baby n me r settlin tings dwn..
n we have made vows to each other..
wuhoo!!
ur mine baby.. u wil alwys b mine!!
haha..
hmph!!
daes aft tt dae, he treated me soo nice..
tt i kip falin in love w him again n again..
ouhh godd!!
bt tt doesnt mean, i cn b steped on..
ryt??
ok.

i apreciate ur apreciation honeyy!